Txt - One person in waiting room coughing so about 30 more ask for masks. Swine flue fear. Looks funny as hell

My sister told me her pediatrician's office passes out masks now to those in waiting room, and of course, getting a mask on a two year old who is sick and in a crappy mood anyway, well, that didn't work out.  

The mental image makes me giggle.  I mean, you're already IN the emergency room, yes? 

Ah well, people are funny. 

TXT: Guy in psych wants his helper-weasel?

"We said no." she adds

I want my helper-weasel too! (laughing)

I don't think I want a helper-weasel.  I'd get injured, I'm sure.  Unless it were an imaginary helper-weasel?

Yeah, I'm thinking way too much about the psych guy.

TXT  "11 ambulances so far today! WTF!"

Quick!  Bring in the helper-weasels!

I have to tell ya, I think the helper-weasel trumps the shiny chicken and I mean to hell and back.  Nothing in the world, like those certifiable.

So true, Elsa.  I prefer the shiny chickens because, well, shiny.  And I'm uberindependent, so the help isn't needed as much as distraction.  But I think weasels would be a lot more useful overall.  *nods*

"number 2 pencil stuck in penis. You tell me why."

LMAO.

 what the hell?!

Jesus Christ!   That hurts, oh that hurts!!  Oy!! 

Oh, why did I have to read that?!  Christ, I'm squirming in my seat, grimacing, cringing...that person should just have his dick whacked off for being a stupid fucker!  Oh, Jesus-Jesus...!!!

too funny..

...well maybe not for him...

When my sister was an intern they had a guy come in with a lightbulb up his.. rear end.

How on hearth???:'(:'(:'(

Reason number 245 I am glad I no longer work in an adult toy store.

And number 99999 that I'm glad I've never worked in an ER!  Goddess bless the people who do, but man I dunno if I could deal with that.  Apparently situations in the category GW describes are FAR more common than we realize.

GW,

Someone should have kicked that fool in the ass--hard enough to hear a smashing sound!        That'd be the last time he tries that trick.

There are some great ideas for new user names here!

GW- As long as the light bulb wasn't on. Or maybe like one of those pulsing xmas lights. hahaha 

Yay!  Hearing about foreign body extractions always make my day!

True story:
When the ex worked in the ER, there was a guy that came in about every two weeks with a vase in his bum.  The first time he showed up, he asked for the vase back because it was an heirloom of his mothers and she would get pissed if it came up missing.  So they bagged it and handed it over.  Same thing the next two times.
On the fourth time, the doc told him, "The only way you're getting this back is if you never come to my ER with it in your ass again.  Otherwise, I'm breaking it.  Now."

Dude took his vase, left, and didn't come back.  To that ER, anyway... 

I am amazed at the juvenile comments that I sometimes fire off when I am in a state of giddiness. One of the things that I enjoy about the blog and boards, besides intelligent discourse, is that the people here have a great sense of humour and of the ridiculous.   

Somebody owes me a new keyboard!  Gotta love the full moon in ERs and anyplace else you have to deal with general public - not.