Unfortunately, there wasn't a way I could convey my smirk as I wrote that title, but trust me: it was there. 

I was reading this post by elfxys and started thinking about my own "dark" urges in sex/relationships.  (Quotes because it's too depraved for some, not depraved enough for others, and normal for still others.)  So I thought, "Well, hell, why not start a thread about it!"  We've got a wide range of people here with all sorts of viewpoints and different spots on the continuum, and I know some of you out there are comfy talking about your more primitive side.

I know there's other places out there on teh interwebs where you can talk about this to your heart's content, but they tend to be insular and can also start a deviance spiral (when progressively more deviant behaviour becomes accepted as normal because "everyone else does it," though in reality there's only a small percentage that actually do).  This is a nice, supportive, "neutral" place for a conversation.  So, c'mon:
Let's talk deviancy, depravity, and darkness!

What about your sex life and/or relationships doesn't fit in the white-picket-fence ideal?  How comfortable are you with it?  Can you see it in your chart?

I absoluteluy LOVE these sorts of questions!!!

but sorry i actually have any of my own deviant sexual behaviours.

i do have 'toys' and a swing and i have watched  dominatrix style adult films where the men are being (cough) stimulated with a dildo or licking womens boots etc 

and used to visit this underground club where theyre where live sex shows and dominatrix's  would walk men around with a leash on all fours ,but that was a lond time ago .....is that deviant enough.

i do have a fantasy that some may consider odd.

other than that i am pretty simple

quietly noting how SaD managed to set this topic forth without revealing a darned thing. /*snicker*/

Yes... SaD... Smoooth :D

Oh, me next, me next says the Venus in 8th house Scorpio conjunct Pluto!

I like girls when they're angry and being dominated by them! It's sexy!

My sex life is very white bread.  I love doing it, I love the feel of it, but I don't get turned on by kink.

My LOVE life is a different story.  I've had some really out there relationships, by how others would judge them.  My brother-in-law was in love with me.  Before I was married, I was in an emotional affair with a married guy, 14 years older than me (I was in my 20s, he in his early 40s), who was going to leave his wife and marry me.  He actually PROPOSED to me!  (Part of the reason it ended was because I was not keen on busting up someone's family.)

I would call this stuff more taboo than dark or depraved.  But believe me, the women in my hubs' family think I'm depraved.  As odd as it sounds, doing that was not about trying to hurt anyone.  We liked each other and took it too far.  If we weren't with other people, we would have wound up in a relationship...definitely sexual, don't know if it would have been anything more serious.  The synastry was interesting, but the composite sucked!

I have Venus (late Virgo) conjunct Pluto (late Virgo) and Uranus (early Libra).

Mine's not exactly depraved, just a little oddball.

Moon-Neptune, Venus-Pluto 12th= active fantasy life.

I also feel compelled to hide things, so I end up feeling like a pervert regardless of how ordinary or odd my experiences are.

I don't like things that would be considered kinky. I don't enjoy odd toys, they freak me out. I do enjoy a little dominance and submission play, but not with toys, just in general. I like to feel fragile/controlled/needed when fucking.

All in all, I enjoy theatrical love-making, romantic, passionate, and sort of like " this is the end of the world and this is goodbye ". 

I think I offered to much information lmfao

Venus in Scorpio conjunct Pluto in the 5th house.

I don't think there  is anything typical when it comes to sexuality. Everyone is unique... and everyone thinks they are depraved. Or everyone thinks they are totally normal.  No details to share here, but I do think my sex life is evolving (well, I hope) and I hope the next partner will be a long long long long term one.  For real, and with real love.

Venus sextile Jupiter

Venus square Saturn

Venus square Neptune

Venus in Leo

12th House

(semi-sextile Pluto)

Not depraved, just imaginative :)

no, i'm not depraved. but every sexual relationship i've had has been highly unique-- for me. i've been told I'm too freaky and I've been considered too timid. to me it is just chemistry, straight up. 

The partners who thought I was too freaky were, in my opinion highly repressed. You see how it goes? Back and forth. I'm most comfortable having a partner who sees sex the way I do: a chance to bond. Sometimes in an unusual way that wouldn't work with another kind of partner. Sometimes it is short-term. Even with my last partner, I feel very much that I learned things of a psycho-sexual nature that I couldn't with another person. But I'm okay with moving on, too. 

Venus in Aries/4th House. Conjunct Mars, in a Grand trine with Neptune and Saturn; opposed Pluto; square Moon; sextile Jupiter; inconjunct Uranus.

I don't know how to answer this question because, to me, anything sexual is completely normal and natural so long as all parties are willing and are of an age/intelligence to consent to it.

I prefer my sex rough/aggressive. I like toys and often watch porn (as discussed in another thread). I'm very self-confident with my body and my sexuality and know what and how I like things. I'm usually naked at home and I don't mind opening the door that way, so you'd best call before you pop in for a visit. 

There's not a whole lot that can shock me when it comes to sex and sexuality. In fact, I'd go so far as to say "nothing", but...never say never, ya know?

Venus in Pisces in the 8th, Sun Conjunct (Pisces), Conjunct Mars, Square Neptune, Trine Ascendant (Leo), Trine Uranus  

Yeah, that was rather slick, wasn't it? *winks @ Goddess and Luna*

"I don't know how to answer this question because, to me, anything sexual is completely normal and natural so long as all parties are willing and are of an age/intelligence to consent to it."
I'd like to say that I agree, but there's a caveat in there.  I think anything sexual is natural, yes, but not necessarily normal.  "Normal" to me means the majority of a given populace does "x" or behaves "y" way... statistically normal I suppose.  There are things out there that statistically very few people engage in, so by my definition it's not "normal," though I dislike calling anything "abnormal" because of the negative connotations of that term (see also: abberant).

"I would call this stuff more taboo than dark or depraved."
I don't know what I'd call it, honestly.  I called it "dark" because that's the term elfxys used, "depraved" because that word amuses me, and "deviant" because we're talking about things that can be statistically deviant (and also because it amuses me ).  Taboo is a good word because it's things that are considered socially impolite to discuss, but "taboo" to me is a bit too strong.  In western culture, cannibalism is taboo.  Anal sex is just... furtive!  *laughs*  (But dark, depraved, and/or deviant to some.) 
I don't know what sort of distinction I'm trying to draw here.  I'm a vocabulary nerd, and there's not a word I can think of to precisely describe what I'm trying to convey.  I think part of the problem is that we're talking about a vast, grey area where things are fluid and subjective.  Absolute language is sometimes limiting in these situations.
Did any of that make sense?

Maybe we should start threads with different gradations of unusual behaviours and practices and do a poll on whether they're (some form of dark, deviant, taboo) or not?  What do you guys think?

Maybe we should start threads with different gradations of unusual behaviours and practices and do a poll on whether they're (some form of dark, deviant, taboo) or not?  What do you guys think?

I think I would not like to see this forum dominated by fringe sex topics... there are plenty of sites for that. This is a general forum, thank you.

I keep losing my comments these days, probably cuz the cat is competing with the laptop for the lap but anyway my point was:

I am pretty cynical about human nature and would probably doubt any kind of sex poll or statistic. People lie, not only to others but to themselves. So, even if something is supposedly "rare," I kind of doubt it is. And I don't measure normal by how many people are doing it. Again, I think the numbers would be off.

Many people STILL  think gay people are deviant. And I guess the stats show that the majority of humanity is straight, right? And yet I believe being gay is utterly NORMAL. 

Disclaimer: just my opinion, others may feel differently! (I always feel like I'm always right. Not sure why that is! Pluto in the 1st?)

(Yawning, deviantly waking up to some breakfast now on a rainy sunday morning...)

hehe... deviant breakfast.   I'm not sure what that would be, but the image is fun to play with.  Non-"breakfast" foods all lumped into one meal... 

"I am pretty cynical about human nature and would probably doubt any kind of sex poll or statistic. People lie, not only to others but to themselves. ... I think the numbers would be off."
Absolutely, the numbers are off.  But even when they're off, it tells us something: what people are not willing to reveal about themselves (which, when you're talking sexuality, are usually things they're ashamed of or consider too "out there" for most folk).  It's like those "purity tests" that float around the web from time to time...  There are people who mark things they haven't done, people who don't mark things they have, people who do both, and people who do neither.  It's about acceptance and social perception.
It's that crossroad that interests me: not so much, what specific things do you do that are odd or on the fringe, but what do you consider out-of-bounds and why?

Taking one extreme, pedophilia, a vast majority of people agree that's pretty deviant and morally repugnant for reasons which are pretty obvious.  But in some ancient cultures it was accepted, though I don't know of any modern cultures where that's true.  Contrast that with something supposedly deviant but rather common in our culture, like BDSM or homosexuality, and it becomes harder to pin down.  Why is it deviant, what's the benefit of the label?  And why are some "deviant" behaviours glamourized while others are vilified?

It's all boundary-play, I think.  Here's my line, this is where I'm comfy, and anything beyond/outside this line is wrong.  We've got a lot of people here who have lines (hell, everyone has lines) but accept most things outside that line as okay, too.  It's the things that aren't okay that's fascinating.

That last bit really sticks with me.  Where are the boundaries, and who writes the labels, to what benefit, and why?  And I mean personally, familially, societally, etc.  I'm fascinated by this stuff!

I have a tattoo on the inside of my right arm, facing out, that says "chacun à son goût" - each to his (or has his) own taste.  My dark side is giggly.  I have no judgment about anyone else's unless it somehow affects me ... but I am endlessly fascinated by people and the way they interact and the way they process our most basic human urges.

I think The Astrology of Sex would be a great "pay to play" Colosseum class.

I for one don't feel like talking about my sex life on the open internet where everything is easily Googled, and should it leak out "who I am" everyone will know what positions I prefer and so forth.

Luci,
...so what time are you usually home? I could pick up the mail for you...smile (I'm being silly but your fedex person must like making deliveries) - you didn't say what your sun or mars is. I just noticed that the past four women that have been in my life all had Mars in Scorpio.

Yeah agree with Elsa, SaD.  The site does got googled.  We don't want to invite the bad flies.  Your subject is titillating to say the least, I remember touching this subject about deprivation and one's response to it in accordance with one's BML sign and house placement.  That's another way of looking at it.

I don't know shit about BML, that's why I didn't mention her.  Whenever I look, though, I have her rising(!), which may account for why I'm fascinated by this stuff (in addition to all my Pluto contacts).

RE: the polls, that's why I put it here first.  Elsa vetoed, and I understand why, which is why it never happened and hasn't been resurrected.  I like to talk about this stuff in an intellectual way (heh... Mars-Venus-Pluto in Libra trine Aquarius moon, it's all intellectual), not to attract, titillate, or shock, just because it's interesting.  Lord knows I don't want to steer the slavering masses here looking for jack material! 

BML rising! Any important planetary aspects with this one?

I don't know what's important or not...  BML rising, conjunct ASC and Jupiter (my "classic" rising planet), sextile N. Node/IC, trine S. Node/MC (both by 2°).  It would be squaring my Mars-Venus-Pluto, but I think 9° is kind-of a big orb... at any rate, I wouldn't be able to seperate out that influence to save my soul!  *laughs*  Any thoughts or good sites to look at, persian?

elizard: Sun in Pisces, mars in Aries. :)

I have no judgment about anyone else's unless it somehow affects me ... but I am endlessly fascinated by people and the way they interact and the way they process our most basic human urges.

Shannon - I think we could be twins somehow, someway.  I couldn't have said it better if you'd plucked right from my brain.  Love it. 

I had to take a peek at this thread...Sun, rising and Mars in Scorpio and I agree with most of you that if two people agree to some "dark depravity" <<tongue in cheek>> it's ok as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. But then this is where it can get "sticky"...you might try something out of titillation of an idea, but the reality may prove to be something else. OUCH!

I love this post!

I am very sex depraved. Been this way for a long time...I have desires, fantasies, and urges, but they are very healthy. Sadly, most my sexual experiences have been lackluster. I need a Scorpio...stat!

Feh.  My SuperScorp keeps saying, "I'm up for trying it out" (besides multiple-partner trysts, he's straight vanilla).  But in practice, not so much.

"Can I ...?"
"No."

"How about ... ?"
"No."

"Well, will you ... ?"
"No."

Finally told him the other day that since he can't give me what I need and won't give me what I want, I had no clue why I was still there.  So at least now he's making small, squirmy steps instead of immediately rejecting the idea outright.  I don't ever think he'll be enthusiastic about it, though.

Nothing wrong with a little light bondage in a loving relationship....but then I am a Scorpio venus and have sun conjunct pluto...

I used to feel depraved in my sexual relationships but I think it's because I didn't feel I could REALLY share that side of myself with my previous long term partners.

The other night me and my honey were talking and and he said something like "You know, if we weren't the same (regarding our sexual tastes/fantasies/etc), it probably wouldn't work out." And I think he's right...

If one person wants to try something and the other one thinks, "WTF?" then that's no good. :p  But when they're equally "fucked up" (and I use that term in a joking manner :D) then it feels great!

I dated a guy that was into the Marquis de Sade. I had no idea at the time what that meant. I mean I had heard the name, but didn't know what he was all about. I didn't think thisguy was depraved...just adventurous. He never hurt me and it made me feel like I was in his hands, like AllState, and didn't quite know what to expect next.

Monica, I think I love you!  What you said about matching levels of fuck-up-ed-ness *snort* is absolutely brilliant!

Personally, I've never felt that anything I enjoy is "depraved" (read: shocking / wrong) until I mention something casually and watch others recoil.  Then I feel completely and royally repulsive, stained and unclean, never to be let in to soil the "lovely people" again.  Which, incidentally, is how it usually happens.
Yet there are soooooo many of the "lovely people" that later come to me and ask questions because they're either interested in or already are involved in something similar, but don't want others to know it.  Because it's LE GASP! wrrrrooooong!  (If I could use emoticons tonight, there'd be a question-guy here!)

Completely baffling.

hehehe SaDiablo

I agree.  As you said in previous posts, I agree that anything sexual is natural.  (of course, this is between two (or more) consenting adults.) But, people get caught up in all these judgements without even stopping to think, "Who the FUCK came up with these rules anyway?!?"  Anyway I think that most societal mores became established out of the desire of one group of people to control another... not because (insert deviant behavior here) is SO wrong/harmful/horrible.

I don't talk about my uh dark desires much except to a friend who happens to have sun and Mercury in the 8th, while I have a scorpio mercury/venus/uranus and sun conjunct pluto, nothing either of us say to the other is shocking and we can discuss just about anything which is liberating, constantly editing your conversations can be bannoying and tiring.

I like the "equal levels of fucked up" and agree that it's pretty brilliant when it works like that.  Yum.

i like to be choked and dominated. mars in pisces, square saturn & uranus. the saturn & uranus squares to my mars would indicate i definitely wouldn't have "normal" sex, even in the sensual, slow sign of pisces