yeah, I was woke up at 2 AM this morning thanks to my craptastic dog, Dora.  Yeah, she was crapping all over the place and Clunk came and told on her.

Yeah, he came in the bedroom, put his paws up on the bed which he's not done for 10 years he is so lard-ish, just could not wait to tell me what that BAD DOG Dora was up to.

I got out of bed, came down the hall and the smell hit me.  It took me 40 minutes to clean up, cursing myself the whole time for giving into her begging / starving dog routine some hours before - damn it.

I also could not figure out Clunk. Boy did he want to tell on her but this is not his usual MO. Usually if she loses it, he loses it right on top of her so in other words you get up in the morning two various-sized piles of shit strewn about and around each other.  Hmm...

I got things under control, got back in bed, but gave up trying to sleep when almost an hour passed and I was wide awake. Uranus transit, yes?

So I got up, still wondering about Cluck because he was just so damned happy to come get me, get Dora in trouble but then the truth revealed.

I went out on an errand some hours later and came home to a turd of Clucky's on the kitchen floor. Yep.  Turns out the bastard had no turd in the middle of the night, see... so he did this other maneuver but he was still not going to miss his chance to shit in the house since DORA got away with it.  I saw that turd and stared at Lucky who stared back at me as if to say, "You know I had to do it."

 Gah.

I told the soldier who wondered out loud why these dogs think they have to out-shit each other which is exactly what they do. "P, you throw their asses out!  You leave again, throw them both in the yard and tell 'em, now get your asses out there and do some shitting!"

 So anyway, this was my night/day today. Damn dogs! Now that the shitting contest is complete we won't see anything like this again up until someone falls prey to Dora and the crap she pulls... feeeeeed meeeee.

ROFLMAO!!! Dog pecking order in action.

I may be very Libra but I grew up on a farm, milking cows by hand twice a day and getting slapped in the face occasionally with a shit covered tail. I did rebel when I was a junior in high school and told my dad I would only milk the cows in the evening 'cause I was tired of going to school smelling like a damn cow!

Oddly, it was my Scorpio sister who refused to learn how to milk cows and helped cook more than do outside chores. She's the one with Venus in Libra, I have Venus in Sagittarius and my Sagittarius sister who was always willing to do the dirty chores has Venus in Capricorn. hmmmmmm

lol that was what I was doing this morning too but a sick cat. I chalked it up to Pluto.

Oh dogs...

I went with my fiance to his parent's house to visit last weekend. Their youngest dog, came roaring in from outside, stopped in front of the "pee pad", took a crap and flew out the door back outside. The dog CAME IN to take a crap, right in front of me! Ridiculous.

No day of mine is complete until I clean up some dog's poo from the kitchen floor... I have a very pooy job actually, working with animals. I am staying with a friend at the moment, she's a double taurus and yesterday the toilet totally stopped working. She was talking about how she couldn't handle dealing with that stuff at all and I'm like.... i deal with it every day, every day.........  

I can relate Moonpluto.  Shit happens daily at my job too.  We just try not to aim the force dryers at the butt region when the shit is coming out or it will be flying instead of falling. 

You KNOW all us Libras are going to read for the mere fact that you told them this was "not for Libra!"

I seem to deal frequently in crap and other bodily/dog fluids. I'm a puke cleaner upper and toilet plunger from way back.

You gotta get that Nature's Miracle stuff so it gets their scent out of the rug (Virgo Virgo Virgo).

LOL Elsa. A thought comes to mind. Is it a phenomenon that people "outshit" each other if they are revolving around a scorpio at the same time? I have this observation coz have seen it so many times....

I has a stellium in Libra, but oddly the only body fluid that I cannot handle is drool.  How weird...    Mebbe 'cause it's all mashed up with Pluto?  Hm.

The first time I went to go meet the ex-MIL I was lectured extensively about her dog.  "To not talk to the dog, do not look at the dog, do not acknowledge her existence.  She WILL piss all over the place if you do."  So we get there and I make my hallos, studiously avoiding the dog who's wiggling all over the place with happiness, when my ex drops to one knee, bellows, "HALLO, JASMINE!!!!" and scruffles her about vigorously.

At which point I prudently stepped out of the way of the rapidly expanding puddle of pee the dog let go of.  *snickers*  Silly puppy.  Silly man.  *wistful smile*

There is no alarm clock that can beat a cat "chucking, that weird stomach throat noise after they do the hacking". That will make me sit straight up in bed wide awake even from the deepest REM sleep, flailing my arms to get them off the bed.

It is strange though how all my Virgo can handle animal icky, whereas anything human baby or grownup will just do me in. I am finding that as I age I am becoming more germaphobic etc. but it still doesn't apply to my animals, although I have been grossed out to the extreme.

Thank the heavens for bleach, disinfectants, and hand sanitizers.  

LOL Daemoness

hahaha, i guess i'm lucky. my cat just sits on my face or licks my eyebrow with her stinky cookie cat breath...

its actually the sound of the alarm clock mon. - fri. that literrally gives me dry heaves ( I shit you not, real dry heaves as I put on my slippers and walk downstairs to get coffee, I heave)....

Oh man Elsa!  My Libra venus made it to the end of the second paragraph and I had to stop.  ~~~ Fainting~~~