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moonpluto,
I have bullied others when I was in grade school (Mars in Aries).
But I have also 'been' bullied (Pisces Ascendant).
I think Aries/Leo types are the most likely to bully (especially Aries).
I think Pisces are the most likely to be bullied. Just my two cents.
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!
I almost started this exact same thread this morning!
:::faints:::
I have a bully on my back...
(and she's an afflicted Sun-Mars square Neptune and Saturn so there you go) You could say I have my own Mars problem - well-placed on AC I guess, but in Cancer.
I was never bullied (
cap trine
). But I was an amazon protector type for my friends Sag
/Asc.
As an adult I knew an Aires
bully.
ah jessica!! I'm sorry to hear this.
I also have the lovely mars in cancer....
Any more chart details of the bully? I am guessing this is a work thing...
Toni: I wonder which came first for you - bullying or being bullied...
moonpluto,
I bullied first, this girl in 3rd grade.
And karma came back and kicked me in the a** in highschool, when this guy verbally abused me! The guy that abused me was a Scorpio.
Oh, and I'm a Sagittarius by the way and boy did I learn my lesson not to bully again!
I've always been bullied (
in 12th) when I was a child and in my teens. It was painful, but in the end, it made me a heck of a lot stronger.
Funny how it's mentioned that Aries/Leo types are prone to bullying because I am an Aries/Leo type (Mars-ruled chart - in Leo). Maybe because my sun is in the 12th and my natal Mars is on retrograde. I am, however, the type of person that doesn't back down from a fight, when provoked. :P
Bullied, definitely. I am not kidding when I say that every single kid in my kindergarten class hated me on sight, and that definitely scarred me for life. It took a lot of years (i.e. over age 18) before I stopped assuming that everyone hated my guts immediately.
My parents are also quite domineering people (Taurus/Scorpio). Odds are I'd probably be a dictator type myself (I have been told I'm the "velvet glove iron fist" sort), except I got squashed EARLY and OFTEN and CONSTANTLY growing up. You just can't be a free and easy dictator with that upbringing.
No idea on the astrology of this.
I find it really disturbing that my jerky cousin's kid is a bully. I think he's not quite all the way there yet, but he's going to be the older he gets. I hear how he acts to my mom's neighbor's kids and it's worrying.
thanks moonpluto - thanks for being tapped-in and timely, you are awesome! :)
I think that Mars/Saturn/Neptune t-square is the red flag. Her Mars in Leo is out-of-sign conjunct her Sun in early Virgo. I have been mentioning her a lot because she's such a burr in my breeches right now.... also, Elsa has been talking a lot about bullies and black hearts and this woman is the classic case of chicken shit when you actually confront her. So I am working on my confrontation skills.
Interestingly, my Aries rising sister says she never gets bullied. You would think my Mars rising would say something, but I have a lot of Neptune aspects and also Pisces on the MC so I think it must get obscured somehow. Plus, I confuse myself and justify their behavior. I was guilty of bullying my younger sisters when we were little - super bossy Cardinal big sister. I guess given Mars in Cancer and Sun in 4th, it makes sense the family is where that would play out. In school and at work, I've always been on the receiving end (getting my comeuppance.) I do think it's a Neptune issue.
Everybody, take Elsa's advice and just tell those bullies "jeez, you are a horrible bitch" and see what happens and report back! I'm working on that myself.
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I was always ripe for a fight, and while I wouldn't exactly say I was bullied, it got me into a lot of trouble. Kids were still bothering me when I didn't want to mess with anyone any more, right around when
crossed my DSC.
I've been told that "I have a mouth on me", and that was how I defended myself whenever anyone picked on me. Most stopped bothering me.
When I was an adult, people with raging insecurities (about their life, their job, their looks, whatever) tried to get me into fights. People who were content never bothered me.
I'm a 
with
conjunct and
rising. One of the themes of my life is how to let my light shine and not to let other people get me down because they don't like how I project myself.
I've endured and inflicted for sure.
I don't ever remember bullying someone because it felt good or because I knew they were smaller and wouldn't fight back. I definitely did have a mean streak though, towards people who rubbed me the wrong way or crossed any of my good friends who I felt were "too nice" about it. With maturity though I realized you have to let (capable) people fight their own battles. But I'll still whoop someone's ass for messing with children, the elderly, the handicapp, and such! =)
As a military brat I always dreaded and hated when my dad had to go TDY (temporary duty) for a long period because my mom would drag us back to Arizona to stay with my grandma. The girs there were absolutely rutheless with me...every time!! I'm talking fist fights in elementary school!! It does make you stronger though.
In high school I always seemed to have trouble with boys. They would attempt to pick on me (I think in a sort of 'I like you' way)...but I was not having it. I never played with their attempts, so I think the 'like' turned into despise. I remember one guy (one out of many who did something similar) took my being absent one day as an opportunity to tell a few people in the class that he fondled me one day during a movie in class. When I came back to school one of the other guys told me about it.....I was on FIRE!! I called him out in front of everyone and got him to tell the truth. He was really embarrassed. But my point is, I won't back down, I don't care if you're a guy..bigger and stronger than me.
My mouth and my kutzpah has gotten me in trouble plenty of times. But I won't be injusticed!! And neither will the underdog as long as I'm around!
9th house Mars in Cancer sq. 12th house Pluto in Libra. Also, Saturn in 12th Libra. Justice! Justice! Justice! I think my Leo sun and Cappy moon also give me the urge to protect.
When you spend a big chunck of your high school years defending yourself against lying boys accusations, and people percieve you in a way that you're not (slutty), I think that is a form of being bullied. I don't think that stigma ever left me. Damn Scorpio ASC...just because I'm sexy doesn't mean I'm slutty =) haha. (Sorry, that's my best way of getting over it)
I've probably never bullied because my sun is in Pisces, but I'm also the LAST person you want to tangle with if you're doing the bullying. My mars is in Aries and my moon is in Leo. I will fight if someone wants a fight and I may not win, but you will get a few excellent rounds out of me before I go down.
My favorite phrase in regard to this is..."I'm sorry, have you ever MET me?" meaning "who would ever be dumb enough to think I'm going to take that shit lying down!?"
And even in romantic relationships - I think I bend over and give in when I shouldn't, but I'll fight my point like hell before then; tooth and nail. Even after I've given in, I'll still want to fight about it.
I take shit lying down all the time. It's been pointed out to me, as recently as today. Need to do something about it.<!--Session data-->
shell, I had an almost identical incident in jr. high. I also called him on it, took him by his ear and dragged his sorry azz around and made him tell people he lied. Told him it was either that or I was calling his Mom & Grandma and telling them what he'd done. Wise him took the lesser of two evils. Boys didn't seem to want to tangle with me after that! ![]()
(and moonpluto - when you go to reply don't you have a smiley face on the toolbar above the box? that's where the emoticons & glyph signs are at.)
I wasn't much of a bully-er, however, I am like you shell in that I'll take on ANYONE who's abusing kids, elderly, disabled. Totally kick their butte into next week and make sure everyone around knows what they are doing as well. Had a fist fight w/3 girls in jr. high one time - they'd been picking on my much psychologically speaking 'weaker' friend. Busted their buns and told em to go pick on someone else their own size. I think I must blow up into some kinda GIGANTIC GINORMOUS evil looking being when I get pissed cause most people just back Way the Heck up when I get riled like that. It's like Elsa's EXPLOSIVE temper. No slow burn there. One minute calm and the next a raging loonie willing to take on all comers! ![]()
I once bullied a younger friend without even really thinking about it; when it was pointed out to me what I'd done I felt really bad about it and never did it again.
I was usually on the receiving end, though, all the way through grade school. High school wasn't as bad, I was good at being invisible by then.
Not sure of the astrology, unless it's that I have Mars in the 12th house where it's hard for me to access. To this day I have problems standing up to people who want me to do stuff I don't want to do, and I still kind of assume that if people notice me it will only be to point and laugh.
No toolbar,Dreams. I mainly use my blakcberry cuz my computer is so old - no toolbar there either--
Jessica, I have this funny feeling that bully is REALLY jealous of you. Not that that helps but -- that's my gut feeling--
Lunalie: maybe it's that cancer moon and 12th house sun...
I had horrible horrible school experiences. Later teen years were better, kind of came into my own-- embraced my outsider status
I was going to ask you guys a question related to this. How would you teach your son to react to bullies? More than that, would you urge your son to stand up for himself and fight? (There's this Pharcyde song with the line "can't keep runnin' away" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hZKN4AZ63g that deals with bullying). I was reading a book in which a son tells his mother that his father sent him to boxing lessons and he doesn't want to do it. She freaks out worrying. She tells a man who says how unnatural for a boy not to want to do boxing. I'm referring to the attitude that boys right now are missing the kind of male energy that Vidroid gets from The Soldier. That there are some sort of codes of masculinity that boys should learn, that women can't teach them. These attitudes seem antiquated and wrong to current philosophies, especially people claiming gender is a social construction. I feel like with girls, there isn't the same pressure that ultimately you can't keep running away and have to fight your enemy without anybody helping you (in a non-metaphorical sense). Would you teach your son to suppress his crying? What do you teach your son about these things?
No, I wouldn't teach a son to supress crying. However, I would inform him of the likely results and to prepare himself for aggression on other boys' parts in response to it. If you do X, then Y is liable to happen and ask him how he'd best handle it. Informed rather than suppressed. I would likely wish he'd suppress it, but I'd try to be gentle with his feelings and inform him of the likely consequences and help him prepare a 'doomsday scenario' that would help ease him out of any likely confrontation that might happen.
My son has never had a real father. But he has Mars in Aries on the MC so he has a man energy to tap into. He not only is not a bully but has over the years stood up for kids who were getting picked on. He's a softie in that way - Sun Libra, Moon in Pisces, Cancer rising...
Jessica, to answer your question: my intuition tells me that. Am assuming you have something they want
I don't have a son, but I bet martial arts of some kind would help tremendously, inside and out--
Interesting, moonpluto, I think you are exactly right. Your comment reminded me of two bullies that bothered me in grade school and middle school. Still have to fight back or transcend, but insight is nice!
I find it unlikely that my son will be bullied. However, I like the martial arts idea.
I have been bullied throughout my entire life, though now I'm in my 30s I am really good at standing up for myself.
One of my siblings slapped the shit out of me every single day from the time I was 5 until I was about 12~ no idea why it stopped~
the sister I am closest to got it too. She has scars all over her body. my mum was mentally unstable and couldn't cope. we teamed up and still are a team to this day, and we have been critcized for it our whole lives.
I got bulled a lot in school. I was choked, slapped, tripped, pushed, ostracized, you name it. Tanya Miller: thanks for the scar on my face you bag! I remember once I fought back though: being followed for days being told how ugly I was until I knocked this girl straight in the face. she cried to the principal but I got off, telling him "I told her to leave me alone, she's a bully!"
I never bullied, but I did have jealousy issues until I was 21. then my best friend from HS died suddenly (I had been jealous of her). Big wake up call. I decided begrudging people their happiness was stupid because they could just, you know, die![]()
Now I'm nice to every body and if someone tries to bully me I tell them piss off and ignore them the rest of my life. I am not scared anymore.
Pluto transited my 11th house, opposed my Sun/Mercury/Chiron for much of my childhood. I think that was it:
I've been standing up to the bully in the last 24 hours! Wooo hoo! Wish me luck and that she's doesn't retaliate behind the scenes!<!--Session data-->
Good luck, Jessica. Is this person a peer at work or a supervisor? Do you have allies there or just the bully? Don't answer if you don't want to
She's a peer who thinks she's my boss. I've been working on the allies... her bullying is by no means confined to me, so I SHOULD have allies, but because I work remotely, it's hard to get aligned. And waging these kinds of wars is so not interesting to me, so I tend to spend that time sending out resumes instead.
Thanks for the luck!<!--Session data-->
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Do you bully? Have you been bullied? Is this a Mars issue?
Or perhaps an afflicted sun? Any signs who you think are prone to bullying? What combinations make someone the bully or the bullee (I made up that word)
Please share....