So I went to a wedding this weekend and my boyfriend "hit it off" with the woman (girl) sitting next to him. Just want to start out saying that this was in no way "inappropriate" behavior. There was no flirting - there was just this kind of exuberance that erupted between them. He was very romantic and loving with me otherwise. We cut a rug and slow danced and made out and took lots of sappy pics and all that stuff.

Truth be told, she and I and my man and her husband all hit it off - lots of conversation, fun and laughter. But I couldn't help noticing the merriment that seemed to surround the two of them especially. So I looked up their charts and her jupiter is conjunct his sun as well as there's a moon/mars sextile or something like that. Just to see if my hunch was on, and it was - they kind of "beam" around each other.

Anyway, in spending so much time with this couple we all learned about each other a bit, and she's a massage therapist and I'm in desperate need of a massage. I have this computer hunch/permanent neckache thing going on... anyway, she did some stuff to my neck and it felt pretty damn good so I'm seriously considering having her give me a massage sometime.

At the end of the night we all decided we were going to be pals and exchanged contact info - and something tells me we really will hang out with these people.

So I'm finally getting around to my question. My man and I were discussing our fun time at the wedding over diner food today. He said, "We should both sign up for massages from Linda!" I just kind of looked at him. 

I was thinking about massages in general, massages from people you know/hang out with vs. complete strangers, massages from other people's wives,and so forth.

I was thinking that I don't know how I feel about this. He and I massage each other pretty regularly - it's part of our "lovins" ritual, you know? We snuggle and massage each other's knotted muscles and then he gives me the high hard one and it's fucking awesome.

So, (Scorpio moon), this is very intimate for me. I would not deny my man a professional massage, but... from someone we may very well hang with, who he also happens to get on with smashingly?

Maybe I'm just a horny biatch, but woman massaging man or man massaging woman = sexual turnon to me. But then, I've never really had a real, professional massage. 

I don't know about this. Maybe I'll ask him how he would like one of his friends massaging ME. 

What's your opinion on massage? Do you get them? Do you and your love massage each other? Would you want some woman friend of yours massaging your man?

If you work as a massage therapist, how to prevent a massage from becoming a bonding experience between the massager and the massagee? 

Frankly I don't let a lot of people touch me. I am REALLY affectionate with people I trust (boyfriends) -- and my pets but that's it... this is a weird concept to me.

Would NOT want my man to get  a massage from any woman under the age of 85 or so. No offense to any seniors reading this, okay?

I also would not want my man to particularly enjoy any other woman's company so much.

Feeling territorial today. My love-life is odd and not in the shape I want it to be, so this is all hypothetical but my primal response is NO. No massages from women....

And actually, getting a massage from a man is NOT a turn-on for me; from women it would be deeply relaxing...

I actually DO believe that these instant friendships my man strikes up with people ARE purely innocent. He really does just have this friendly vibe (when he's not getting fired up about something) that draws people to him upon sight. Leo rising.

I remember we were hiking once and this random dude just latched on and proceeded to talk to him for like 15 minutes straight. This happens all the time... I can't really say that it's specific to women.

I don't know. He has that goddamned Mars in the 8th.

Yeah - no. I'd be way uncomfortable with that, too.

Convince him to get a couples massage with you from an unknown third party. Make it about you two relaxing together.  

I think a professional massage is very different from a sensual friend/lover massage.  On the other hand, if this doesn't feel right for you, she would probably recommend someone else who could provide a good professional massage.  I'm sure as a professional she would understand your desire for boundaries.  

Moonpluto, what's the matter? Why are you doubtful about your relationship lately?

i have 2 bizarre "relationships"

i have uranus transiting my 7th, has been for a while and i'm entangled in something unconventional and painful and isn't working (for me).  Yet, it's been TWO years and the longest relationship i've EVER had.  Have strong feelings for this person but... it isn't working. It's broken.

And then there is my scorpio friend from high school who found me on facebook a few months ago. I posted abt him looking for advice. He invites me to visit (we haven't seen each other since age 18), he lives on west coast, and then changed his mind (or, as he put it, wussed out).  Time passed and he invited me again and then stops communicating and I assume he's changed his mind again. Frustrating. Disappearing acts.  Max gave me great advice on that thread, but I need a little something along the way.... When we speak, we know there is something powerful between us. But I can't carry it by myself.

I am tired of men who are afraid. Afraid of love, afraid of me -- whatever it is.

Sorry to hijack your thread, bananas: but you asked!

I'd not be happy with him getting a massage with someone he "beamed" with.. But look to see if their mars/venus hook up or if pluto/venus do something to get a better sense of if she's a threat.

I would be totally honest with him.  No massages from Linda! Just say "I'm aware that this is totally irrational, but if you got a massage from Linda I would be consumed by jealousy, Sorry, thats just what would happen.  No I'm not threatened by Linda, I know that things between you and her are innocent, but I know how my feelings work and thats just what would happen.  So please for me, will you get a massage from someone else? thanks."

Every time I hear the name Linda I think of Gary Wilson

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NlSzwrwokrI

Any kind of body work and I take a day to recover from. I was with someone for almost 8 years who suffered from catastrophic injuries from an accident and he required a lot of body work.He developed a close relationship with several of his body workers and I thought this was totally normal, given his chart. He wouldn't be able to have it any other way. He would not have healed in the way that he did/has in any other way other than to develop a psychological relationship of sorts. No romance, just kind and deep connections. He has had the same dentist since he was 18, for example (he's 50). And they talk deeeeeep. Must be his Scorpio. I dunno. Some people don't want to be man-handled by just anyone.

I was trained in reiki and quit practicing because I experienced psychic visions about my clients and wasn't ready for it. I knew about my psychic stuff but wasn't at a stage in my life where I wanted that in it.

Then I trained in traditional Thai massage...had several clients who praised me to the high heavens and I had the same bloody experience, along with dreams about them all night, and if it was a man, forget it. I'm a sexual person. Not cut out for body work on anybody but my lover, obviously.

I'm sensitive and physical and must chose my bodywork practitioners wisely. But learning how to give myself reiki and massage myself helped me more than anything.

If he wants to protect his relationship with you, he should not get a massage from her.

In my experience if you have to ask then the answer is no. If he were my boyfriend I wouldn't like him going to Linda.

While you don't doubt the innocence or the fact that this lady is a professional, I would feel weird having someone I know lay hands on my man. Especially someone I know he hit it off with.

I'd just tell him the truth and expect him to understand. Doesn't mean you can't hang out with the other couple...

Thanks everyone for your thoughtful and truthful responses.

The thing is... I don't think he is sexually attracted to her, at least not yet. This girl just exudes confidence and for that reason she attracts everyone - even I felt drawn to her. It's like she puts out this Beautiful Person vibe... glowing from the inside out. 

I don't think I've ever come across someone so genuine, open and friendly from the first meeting. And I do believe massage therapy IS her calling. It's like you need to have a healing type of aura for that ((KASH)). This woman put her hands on me and I felt nothing but warmth and kindness - someone very sure of who she was and totally accepting of others. 

(Also... the moon was in Aquarius that night and I'm pretty sure she's a double Aquarius. And I can't believe I actually just said that!!).

Moonpluto, I would say that the distance thing is a challenge more than anything else. If I had a manfriend across the country, I'd be thinking, "Oh. He probably just said he'd fly out and see me out of obligation. Or... because people say things like that but then don't mean them." 

Sometimes it's hard to get the guy across the street to meet you for coffee, let alone a guy in CA who you haven't seen since HS to come in to NY or wherever.

I would say that if you're really interested, just keep communicating with him. Write letters and share your thoughts. Sometimes people change the path they're on based on relationships of this kind. If not... well, you've got a friend, and there are plenty other fish in the sea...

Uh........hell no! 

Sorry - that response is not very thoughtful - but telling you what would be the truth for me.  No, no, and no!

Absolutely with everyone else here: not only no, but hell no, and not only hell no, but fuck no.  Find another masseuse, please.  Too uncomfy with this situation.

Dorothy I LOL'd :)

Bananas with all good bodyworkers, it is totally okay and above board to express an desire to avoid 'conflict of interest' as with doctors or whatever.

If she is as awesome as you felt, then perhaps she could recommend another practitioner to you, one she trusts and likes.

"I'm hoping we can get to know each other on a personal rather than professional level...can you recommend someone to me for massage, and you and i go for coffee some day?"

my belief is that she wouldn't be offended in the slightest. 

If you feel uncomfortable with it, it's best to tell him so, I think.

Also I read the thread title as "Getting Massacred by Other Men's Wives."

ROFL Beth!  That is a whole new board, one I want to be on!!