Comfortable; it's never bothered me.
I was aware of this inevitability even as a child: I loved history in school from a very early age, and clocked that you had to do or be something truly spectacular to be remembered... I love graveyards too - here the ground around parish churches is full of gravestones you can no longer read. There's something comforting to me about returning to the void: I've never understood the need to be 'famous'
I'm also indifferent. I've got the love in my heart and a front seat to the show of life. Posterity is a non-issue because we never get remembered accurately anyway. Though I do still contribute my services to the abstract "future" because I am fulfilled in doing things that imagine long-term possibilities.
It honestly makes me sad. That everyone's stories end up lost.
These quotes always make me sob:
"But after all there was only the mystery of poverty that creates beings without names and without a past, that sends them into the vast throng of the nameless dead who made the world while they themselves were destroyed forever."
"The he read the two dates, '1885-1914,' and automatically did the arithmetic: twenty-nine years. Suddenly he was struck by an idea that shook his very being. He was forty years old. The man buried under that slab, who had been his father was younger than he."
"As it had been in those days when, returning after a brief stay in the foreign country where she was born - those funereal visits, those aunts about whom she was told: "It's the last time you'll see them," and actually see their faces, their bodies, their ruins, and she wanted to go out screaming; or else those family dinners on a tablecloth embroidered by a great-grandmother who was long since dead and whom no one thought about, except she who was thinking about her great-grandmother when she was young, about her pleasures, about her appetite for living, like herself, marvelously beautiful in the bloom of her youth, and everyone at the table was paying her compliments, and on the wall around the table were hanging portraits of beautiful young women who were the ones who were complimenting her now and who were all decrepit and worn out."
"And today all of them are threatened with eternal anonymity and the loss of the only consecrated traces of their passage on this earth, the illegible slabs in the cemetary that the night has now covered over;"
-The First Man by Albert Camus
I feel part of an historic moment. (One among so many!) Which has nothing at all to do with my own name being remembered.
I wouldn't mind at all, however, if we, as a whole, made these times matter in a fantastically amazing and beautiful way. Wouldn't that be a spectacular first. (I know. I know. I know. I'm in a little happy bubble tonight that sees possibilities. Don't bust it too too fast, OK? On second thought... Go ahead... Bust it. It will just make me work harder.)
"That everyone's stories end up lost."
I got this book of poems from the 1800's. It means so much to me, it would take me 10 or 20 years to find the words to explain. I don't know if anyone liked these poems when they were first published, I have heard that no one did. So maybe they were written for me. I mean they were written for whoever and for whatever reason but all these years later the man's writing lands in my hands like...like...like something beyond gold so you just never know. You can be lost to history but then some freak comes to town from the desert and your 100+ writing lands in her hands and all the sudden you're found.
@Elsa - I am totally there with you on that! There are these little jewels that get lost and then someone might just randomly stumble upon them. I find that when I used to go to help out at a Senior Citizen's home I would find so many people who's stories should have been treasured for the newer generations, but I wonder if most people would even appreciate it anymore? I find for the most part, people just simply don't care about things that have come from the past, they just want NEW NEW NEW even if the NEW is meaningless. (Not that all of the past literature and such was good or that the future things that are created aren't all bad or pointless). I just think people need to know their past to build their future.
I think everyone might connect to some story, but I ultimately think it's personal. Sometimes things reach out and hold us at the heart and don't let go and that's timeless.
It's funny because I went to a tiny little museum about this tiny town in my state and met this WW2 AND Korean war vet. He'd been stationed both in Japan and Korea and it's was just crazy to meet someone who'd been to the same places as me so long ago. And then just the little stories about the town and this house that some rich folks had made and then was torn down after not being cared after. I wonder how that must have felt... having lived there and watching everything change and all the old things fall apart and then get built up over.
Anyway, I'd like to write a book of non-famous older people's stories. I always find them fascinating.
I'm actually glad! Are you kidding me? Thank God people know how to forget or have the ability to. I have skeletons in my closet like everyone else so I would be happy if you all just act like I told you nothing and then forget! LOL.
You can be lost to history but then some freak comes to town from the desert and your 100+ writing lands in her hands and all the sudden you're found.
I feel this way in litterature class. We're studying about some scraps written by a bunch of copists from 1200 on juridical papers because they didn't want to waste paper.And we are studying about them, if only they knew...
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If you consider that eventually all of us wil be lost in history, how do you feel?