Experiences dating men with Moon Pluto ? What were some manifestations?

Mother issues. He was the one who told his mom that his dad was cheating.

Very stormy emotionally. Prone to depression.

Lots and lots of repression. He had the square, and moon opposite sun.

Difficult for him to love or trust.

He wouldn't open up to me and it was very frustrating.

what about initially? As in, seemed like he was open, but then once feelings were realized... difficult time being vulnerable?

Same as fieryvirgo.

Same as fieryvirgo and eixiander.

Also appeared to be a caring loving mama's boy type before dating and in the first one month or so but completely shut off later on.

Acted very clingy also, and sometimes I got a feeling he was confusing me with and projecting a lot of mother stuff on to me.

Lots of loose end with past women like he didn't want to let them go. And even though we were quite committed, he fooled around with other women and kept them handy in case I left.  

Had addiction issues too. Was quite a handful really. (he was also into gaslighting a lot) 

Worst was he would completely shut me off, and when I broke off would pursue me much more. Kept me really confused for couple of years. Sort of like left a lot of loose ends with me too.

yeah so far I experienced being completely shut off all of the sudden.

may I add, I didn't see it coming at ALL ... which made me suspect to point to Moon Pluto

My best guy friend of 13 years has Moon square Pluto. He is the most secretive person I know. I've never met his family, he is the ony one in our group of four whose family we don't know. He's had really serious things happen, like people he's close to dying, and he would never tell anyone until months later in passing. I still have no idea what his sexuality is. The first time I went to his house was after knowing him for 6 years, everyone was so excited to finally see it haha. And since then I can count on one hand how many times I've been back. Its strange that he's so secretive, his only Scorpio planet is Pluto and he has no 8th or 12th house planets. I assume the secrecy has to do with the Moon-Pluto connection. Him and his mom are really close.

My cancer brother is also a moon-pluto man, but he has the sextile. He dates a lot suposedly but he's never told us the names of any of his girlfriends so that's secretive. I don't think he has ever introduced his friends to our family. I've never met any of his friends. As a kid he had a really intense relationship with my mom but it's straightened out. Sextiles are easy like that.

Moon pluto #1 had that typical overly attached domineering mother who took him away from me. Too stereotypical.

Moon pluto #2 watched his mother get beaten by his father. Hasn't seen is dad since he was 7. When he tried to contact his father his mother had him arrested. He is very protective over women as a result and often gets taken advantage of by evil bitches who have been abused.

@nymzie interesting interpretation of a sextile. I have it too

wow

@Pearl... very true... I didn't see his shut off coming at all either. 

The secretive part is very true also, and he had no planets in fourth eighth or twelfth either. Rather a stellium in first which made him appear extrovert and talkative but there was so much he never talked about. I never knew who his friends or roomates were while we were dating, had to sort of guess them out. 

Mmm. Pluto in a T square with the Moon and Venus. Boy can I pick them. Secretive, silent, acted like a perfect gentleman before we got together then subsequently turned out to be a world class gaslighter. Basically , he was terrified of women but couldn't admit it and had to control them. But only, it seems, the one he was sleeping with. All other women were either saints or whores and he played me against his sister, who could do no wrong. He had kids from  a previous marriage and made himself out to be father of the century which also turned out to be a total fantasy. Blamed his mother for everything. Yawn.

^this is why I cringed while writing.

Mine pretended to be into all the things that I was...at first. Hung out at my bar, etc.

Gaslighting, making up offenses and having the fight with me in his head...

Secrets for no reason. Just...

Seven years. Wow.

Silence as a weapon. Must be the most horrific thing ever. I'd have preferred it if he hit me because then the anger could be seen and dealt with. 

I have the sextile too, so although I had a traumatic relationship with my mother, I've been open and able to resolve much of it. What I find with the hard aspects, certainly with men, is that they refuse to even acknowledge they might have a problem. And how can a relationship develop with that kind of attitude? 

I'm married to a man with a very tight Moon/Pluto opposition tied to some other stuff in a T-square. The kind of stuff people into astrology who've seen the chart have had a strong reaction to, because it really is a strong marker. Yes, I admit it took years for him to truly open up and it was extremely frustrating  for me at times. I still have occasional feeling he is holding something back. But after living together for 7 years, and sharing most everything, if there's some big, dark secret there, I don't have any clue on what it might be.

He has an Aries Jupiter/Moon/Mercury, and definitely has a way with words. He can be argumentative too. That makes him successful in his chosen profession. But in all these years, he has been purposely verbally mean to me twice, both times were early in the relationship, first two years, and he was genuinly mortified afterwards.  Physical agression isn't his thing, at all, he has been in a fight once in his life, and never with a girl. We do bicker, but it's more of the kind of thing that makes people hearing us smile. It's his Aries saying something outragious and my Libra reacting to that.

But, in few words, I'd say he doesn't open up to people easily, but when he does, he is extremely loyal. And what you see is what you get, he reserves mindgames to business environment.

My partner has Moon/Neptune in Scorpio sextile Pluto. As a Taurus, I love the energy. He is very engaged emotionally and isn't afraid of my emotional nature (I have Moon sq Pluto, myself). 

His mother is his only family member and it has been that way most of his life (he's in his early 40s). There are others but there is religious conflict and he has no contact with them and hasn't for decades. They want nothing to do with him and act like he doesn't exist.

Besides the astrology abandonment will bring this out in men as well. Abandonment=mommy issue(at least 90% of the time in my research)

GREAT Topic, Pearl!!!

I love moon pluto men. They don't get scared off easily. My scorp moon appreciates it :)

I have pluto quincunx my moon, plus I'm extremely Plutonian myself with Scorp-Taurus placements. So, I like the energy and in this case pulled in by it because it's very comfortable/natural for me. But, it was shocking to say the least to be shut off once things got sweet.

@opal, "silence is a weapon" ....clearly... however, it feels rather destructive on his behalf. "Things feel good... bang bang bang"

guess that's that

Rachel -"I love moon pluto men. They don't get scared off easily. My scorp moon appreciates it :) "

Ditto on this. Spoken as a Gemini Moon in hard aspect to Pluto. 

I've read a lot of the negative comments here. So in contrast to that, I would like to add:

They do take a LOOOOOOOONG time to crack open, like a walnut with the hardness of a diamond and it is best to back off and NOT to ask too many personal questions upfront. Patience will be key. Your persistence has to endure a few months to a few years to earn merit badges. Why? They love to pierce you and want to get to know you better but HATE being probed. It makes them wary. They are not going to release their feelings to just anybody. You have to pass some tests or at the very least, make yourself entirely vulnerable and expose your core to them. If you show that you trust them (and you can!) they, in turn, will trust you. And become your best friend forever.  Once you've crossed from stranger into friendship territory, you'll find that they're very tender and sweet in the middle. Albeit raw and sensitive. Once you've crossed that threshold... you can trust them with your life, your secrets, your money and to have your back at all times. I mean like literally. It is like that!

Mothers tend to be either loved or loathed. No in-between. Whether they complain about it or not is up to the individual. Some discuss nothing and others, like cited here, have "mommy issues."

Using your intuition is key to knowing when is the appropriate time to ask or not ask intimate questions. Their emotional energy is so strong, that you will be able to know. If your intuition isn't strong or wires get crossed, I've found that asking questions can usually be prefaced with a warning of: "I would like to ask you a really personal question. Can I?" And they choose to not to answer it, respect that and don't push it any further. If you're okay with waiting it out, they WILL answer. On their timetable. Not necessarily yours.  And believe me, they don't forget. Not ever.

They get scared off from too much intimacy too fast. It makes them vulnerable. 

Moon-Pluto people are like a power-happy drawbridge operator. If you pay the toll (opening yourself up first), you can pass go without complication. They'll even happily wave you in. And you can bask in the glory of having crossed that bridge because they are awesome people to hang out with once you've gained their trust. Funny, smart and loyal. 

If you attempt to cross without paying (making yourself vulnerable first) or if the check for the toll bounces (ie: falsity, boundaries violated, trangressions etc) then that bridge will snap up so fast, it'll make your head spin. Doesn't matter whether you're on that bridge or not. They'll watch you drown with sadistic pleasure. No forgiveness.  No going back.  

Even after you've crossed the bridge...expect them to disappear periodically. They thrive copious amounts of solitude. Don't infringe upon it. They won't forget you. Just be patient. The flipside of this is clinginess. They will alternate from one end of the spectrum to the other. Constantly. Be prepared for that. They can be entirely independent and aloof or totally clingy and emotionally dependent. Time will balance those two energies out.

Unconditional acceptance of their utterly complicated inner persona is important. And it takes special people to know that!

This goes for Pluto-Moon men AND women!

This Moon/Merc/Venus trine 3rd house Pluto loves K@'s post and it reminds me of why the sensitive, patient, considerate approach of Cancers so often hits the spot.

I almost never volunteer details about myself offline/IRL -- even simple, inconsequential things that most others wouldn't think twice about sharing -- which often does turn people off and make them suspicious of me. Usually, they get fed up and stop trying to get closer. When asked personal questions in a discreet and caring manner, though, it makes all the difference.

It can be very difficult for me to achieve self-disclosure in relationships, but it provides the level of intensity that I crave.

This has been a very redeeming thread!

Just out of curiosity (and to absolve some guilt for me).... would anyone like to share what the incident was that led to the shut off?

In my case it was a normal conversation where I told him I was considering changing my job which could have meant me moving away. It was just a discussion sort of an opener for discussion and he just hit me with - fine if that's how selfish you want to be. I could actually feel his complete determination for that to be the end of everything.

I spent two years trying to get him back to a talking state but it just didnt happen. I didnt even switch jobs eventually but it just did not make a difference for him. 

I blamed myself for just bringing up that topic for a long time after that. 

Did you feel it was triggered or it would've happened for something else really minor?

Wow! As a Moon conj Pluto person myself, I've been really interested in this thread. Good reads everyone!

Mov, my situation was very similar. We were out and had a lovely night, we were both very pda which I never participate in. But, i let my hair down so to speak. Then he reached out to me a few days later... and the convo was nice. Then, after that he dropped off. He ignored me and then I ran into him after he ignored me. It was like a total change in personality. I didn't recognize the person.

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