I fear that one day everyone will know that I am just human. I color my hair blond to blend the gray that I have had since I was seventeen. I use humour to cover my insecurities and my weight fluctuates like a balloon being inflated and deflated on a daily basis. I sometimes feel (most of the time) my mother hates me but she is also my best friend(scorpio) I ask peoples opinions on things, but don't always respect the person I am asking. I am a chamelieon who changes color to fit into every social environment known to mankind. I believe in God and the bible but fear admitting I need a saviour.(though I do) Thank you Jesus. I love all people ...even the rotten ones because I myself have rotteness in me. I am thankful for this blog because I can really be me without physical judgement.( shame on me for giving a shit) I believe that is the worst kind of judgement out there. This is me . I fear and face me everyday. Great Idea Elsa! I feel better.

I am afraid of everything.

• I don't want to be an adult (adulthood depresses me)
• I am afraid of driving because if I screw up I could kill someone. Right now I am flat out refusing to get my permit again for the whateverth time.
• I'm afraid of paying for dental visits
• I'm afraid of losing my job (well, probably not this year) because I have no other skills in life that anyone will pay money for, and then I will have to move home with mommy and get suicidal.
• I'm afraid of being In Charge (my chart really indicates that I should. joy.) and turning into a screaming asshole the way it seems like all people in power get sooner or later.
• I'm afraid of becoming an entrepreneur because I hate business stuff with all my heart and have a math learning disorder on top of it, but nobody is ever going to hire me to be an artist.
• I'm afraid of being nothing but expendable frills in this economy. Which I am.
• I'm afraid of having to go without health insurance and getting a horrible disease later in life if I become an entrepreneur. I am just not at all okay with this as an outcome.
• I'm afraid I will make nothing out of myself and I will live a boring life with nobody...still, forever, and if I wait until I'm "ready" I never will be ready.

I am afraid of the soldier's doctor appt. today

Sending good vibes Elsa.

I'm afraid of being falsely accused of something. Like JonBenet Ramsey's mother, perhaps. That would be a total nightmare.

I'm afraid of learning how to drive. My bf has put his foot down and said 'no more road trips til you learn and can share driving' and it FREAKS ME OUT. 

Not knowing how to drive is really shameful for this Sagittarius ASC.  

I am afraid of:  not having choices, not being able to leave, getting stuck in anything, unwanted attention, not having control, having control, too much responsibility, failure, mistakes, rejection, criticism, not being able to understand, having feelings, being controlled by feelings, not getting along, anger, love, loss. I'm afraid all my life I will love others deeply...and yet they won't know or feel my love at all, it just won't come across. I'm afraid I have too many fears and they control me. And of course, the dentist.

kashmiri-i was scared before i learned to drive, too, and for a while after i first learned. it freaked me out to have that much power available with a car that...well, i don't want to make it worse. it was just hard.

one of my best friends also had a driving phobia and my daughter has struggled with fear of driving as well. in each case, all of us were able to push our way through it and it worked out fine. my friend and daughter both struggled with anxiety and panic attacks and learned to get past that and drive without issue, along with lots of other things. it gets easier as you do it, i promise. and it totally opens your world up.

I was afraid to drive but got over it pretty young.  My 17 yo Sag son won't get his license which baffles his dad who was tearing around the country side at earliest opportunity.  My man learned to drive not long before I met him at the age of 40.  I taught him how to drive stick last year when his car broke down and all we had was a standard transmission vehicle and I was sick of him being stuck at home and miserable. 

 My biggest avoidance - Paperwork related to government agencies.  Need to take care of some stuff related to my youngest son's birth certificate.  Ugh.  

 I've been avoiding diet changes and generally working towards being healthier but am starting to make small changes.  It's easy for me once I get going so can't say it's really a fear.

Elsa, hope there's good news from the doc or at least not too bad news. 

I'm afraid of the power of my words to hurt others.

I'm amused at the number of Sag-ish people who don't drive. (I'm a Sag moon.)

The entire process scares me, really. If I get the license I will have to drive and I don't like being around other people in cars. It's "boring yet difficult" to do on a good day.

MY oldest sister is a dble sag and does not drive. My other sister, sadge moon con jupiter and did not learn to drive until she was 30 or so.

I on the other hand, stole Henry's truck when I was 10 years old and went to the store for some candy. ;-)

Major fear: Making a mistake that harms someone I love.

 Minor fears: Sealing an envelope with nothing inside.  Thinking I put the envelope in the mailbox but really it fell on the ground.  Forgetting to put on postage.

 I need a minder. 

Pluto is going to go retrograde next month. That scares me. :(

Hmmm were do I begin. 

-getting old and my health failing.

-dying

-what is in the hear after.

-losing my mind.

-not remembering this life in my next.

-being seperated from my loved ones.

-maybe everything I think is reality isn't.

I have minor fears but these are the biggie.

Dying and nobody finding my body for days.

Remaining immediate family members dying. (Lost 4 in 6 years. can't take anymore losses like that .)

Ending up living in a van down by the river.

Becoming physically incapacitated (wheelchair or bedridden) because i'm independent almost without exception. I would rather someone kill me if that happened. 

Fears: 
- Making mistakes that cause irrevocable harm
- Not gaining the respect of my dad, ever
- Having people make fun of me or embarrass me in front of everyone else.
- Being fired. 
- Being rejected again and again, with no end in sight
- Being so mentally diseased or having such a screwed up personality that no one will think I am okay enough to handle my own life. 
- Being useless in the long run.
- Not earning enough. 
- Not gaining respect of those who work with me.
- Not getting better at what I do, or being who I am.
- Being rather unhelpful.
- Being invisible.
- Being seen.
- Criticism from anyone for doing any of the above.
- Being completely and utterly alone
- Apocalypse
- Losing hope.

Nope, nothing big here, lol. 

wow. i am humbled by the fact that people are able to voice their fears. I have Pluto-cap moon-aries mars T-square and admitting fear is...er, well, guess. 

i was so afraid of living when i was a teenager i was suicidal. i remember feeling like looking to the future was looking into an abyss. i am so, so, so glad i pulled out of that. my wish for people is that they overcome their fears. naming them is a brilliant idea. thank you for heart for posting this thread and thank you elsa for unearthing the topic for us to think about. 

miss...seeing the word 'hear' in your comment and then looking at your profile pic is surreal. i like it. 

oh and i overcame a fear this week. a friend of mine was slicing me to shreds with his words last week. i hate, hate hate telling people they hurt my feelings (current pluto triggering that T-square).

I wrote my friend and told him.  Straight up: "I love you. Stop. This is killing me." 

He apologized. I just bumped into him at the corner store and he was so, so, so kind and I was so happy someone heard me I can't stop crying. oooooooooooo overcoming your fears can be so, so, so rewarding. 

of course, i still need to get my dang learner's!! 

Crackers said: "I need a minder. "

I thought it said REminder at first.  I have phone alarms set for everything because I forget so much.  I have an alarm set to put my son's karate uniform in his bag on karate days, an alarm set to remind me to pick him up from karate instead of meeting the bus at the house.  I even set an alarm to remind me to call my mom on her birthday a couple of days ago.  

Youngest son comes with me to work sometimes.  He goes upstairs to the comfy room with tv and I worry that I'll leave and forget he's there.  Other people are there so it's not like he wouldn't be ok but still.  I have left my dogs at the shop once or twice.  I work in a groom shop/kennel so again not tragic.  Mother of the year that's me.  :)

 Yeah.  I worry about forgetting something/someone important.

uhm, I'm trying not to use this thread (which I love) as a resource to find new fears.

 I'm afraid of physical pain (not talking bee stings here.)  Emotional pain, not so much.  I'm afraid of anesthesia - I really don't want to be here, but not be here, in that way. As a Pisces, you'd think I'd be used to that!  

I'm afraid of birds.

*Not being in control (though I know it's probably just an illusion to think that we ever really completely are)
*Being ridiculed or embarrased in public
*That I'll never have a family of my own
*Death/Apocalypse (though I am not religous... I just heard too much about this from Jehovah's Witness Aunt and Uncle when I was a kid that has always been the main underlying theme in my nightmares.)

Funny enough, I am also afraid of the concept of eternity... lol

Monica -

Totally feel ya on the being ridiculed & on the Apocalypse!  Yay! ... However, I think I just watched too much TV as a kid.=P

When I was a wee lass, my father kidnapped me from my mother. He dropped me off at his parent's house, and took off, too.  I didn't see her again until I was 8. Dad was in and out of my life, but not much. My mom died when I was 20.  My ex-husband went to work one day and didn't come home, which was a shock and very unexpected.
 

To say I have a HUGE fear of abandonment is almost unnecessary, at this point.  It's wrapped up in -everything- that I do, and I've been working hard to combat it.

((luci))

I'm afraid that when people really get to know me well they'll realize how little substance I have.  Like they say about Oakland, when you get there, there isn't any "there" there.

{{luci}}

I'm afraid of debilitating sickness.

I've had 2 of my big fears come true, which really has been a major gift for me.

I have way less fear since that happened. I can't imagine going through these Pluto and Saturn aspects without that.

I'd be a totally paranoid right now instead of only periodically paranoid.

Kashmiri. I live in northern BC. Stop in and say hi!

PS:  Once you get past Abbotsford traffic is not an issue.

Why astrologically is fear coming up lately?

 Lately I'm afraid of so many things.  I want to believe that everything will be okay.  I feel all the uncertainty, suddenly.  It's serious, real, uncertainty.  (Saturn/Uranus?)  The possibility of anything scary happening.  I have OCD traits and this scares me the most.  I'm afraid to mention them, but it's basically the stuff you guys have been mentioning. 

togi! is it smithers or terrace? i forget. going to haida gwaii for the edge of the world festival! :::fingers crossed:::

Hi Heart.....I found this post very deep and endearing.  I was surprised to read my morning paper and find this article on the front page....so you are on the right track and it must be so cathardic to do what you did as evidenced by this man's mission for an art exhibition and he was stunned at the response.  I copied it so you could read part of this.  Most of the fears described by everybody here on this post are many of my own too and it seems inherent in so many folks out there.....we are not alone.

>In late 2004, Frank Warren had an idea: distribute postcards -- in coffee shops, in libraries, on the street -- and ask people to write their secrets on them, then send them back to him anonymously."It felt kind of like a prank or a sociological experiment," Warren said this week. "But I soon realized that I had tapped into something mysterious and wonderful."< 

I am afraid that I am getting having faith and being in denial all mixed up.

I am afraid of the nasty scenarios I entertain myself with coming true.

I am afraid that my love is not reciprocated and that

I am afraid I wont be able to stop thinking up things to worry about when everything is ok.

I am afraid that I can't "just let it go".

I am afraid that I am won't be able to accept the fact that my man is a handsome hairdresser who works with a bunch of beautiful girls and he's a good loyal honest guy and I just still have trust issues because I am projecting all my bad qualities onto him while he is faithful and loyal man and doesn't fuck around. I am afraid that once I really fully trust, I will one day be disappointed and I'll feel really stupid. Maybe it's that fact that I used to be a female douchebag and cannot be trusted. His simplicity and character makes me feel shameful of myself and on my bad days, I wonder what the fuck he's doing with me...

This is all coming up now that I am in saturn return territory... and this venus retrograde... man am I visiting old places and faces...

Finally, I am afraid because I feel the pressure of making these 180 degree changes in my life on so many level and it's so drastically different from who and what and where i've been, I don't know what to expect. I look forward to it but I am not sure what's coming ahead. I just want to be good. I can't keep living and get stuck on the same negative thought patterns anymore, it doesn't feel right anymore. Lying doesn't feel right, memories of cheating feels fucking terrible, drinking doesn't feel right, doing drugs is just the last thing on my mind, not working out makes me feel guilty, not eating healthy makes my skin break out... 

sorry I just typed so much...I feel really vulnerable being so honest about all this... 

This is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read... and so comforting, so human.

I fear: 

- that I am unlovable

- trusting anyone or anything because I can't bear to be let down again

- not being seen.. ..really seen... but being the creation of someones imagination

- ever being in a postion again where I am completely helpless and I get wounded

- living too long

- failing to find peace within myself

Thanks all for writing all this. I read all your posts and it is very brave of you to share your fears... I almost feel much more of a connectedness do you all - and I feel a little more... human :)

I've been needing to unload for a while, and I think this will be therapeutic... so here goes. 

• I am afraid that when people get to know me, they will see ugliness.
• I am afraid that people will think I'm an idiot because I lack interest in intellectual matters. I used to overcompensate by reading, researching, and watching documentaries for the sake of masking my lack of intellect. I stopped doing this because I got exhausted, but I find myself bursting in tears around my intelligent friends when I cannot contribute.(I also lack Air signs)
• I am afraid of getting fired - because my mind gets fuzzy (adult ADD) with details (Going through my Saturn return at the moment and I have Saturn in Virgo in 6th)
• I am afraid that my wonderful and loving best friend and boyfriend will leave me for someone more intelligent, detached, quirkier and cuter. Despite how we are so compatible in so many levels, I still feel that a woman with such qualities is a better woman than the trainwreck that I am.
• Since I moved to Canada completely on my own without any family in the city that likes me (Hey, what can you do? I'm a rebellious Asian girl), I fear that one day I will lose my job and be destitute and nobody will extend a hand to help me.
• I am afraid of posting my picture online because I look utterly repulsive.
• I am afraid that I will burn out and collapse. Almost 29 years of people-pleasing and overcompensating can be exhausting, and I think I've reached the point where I am too tired to ever do anything anymore... :(
• I am afraid that if I do things for myself, the people I love will accuse me of selfishness...
• Yet on the other hand, I am afraid that if I don't do things for myself (aka pursue my ambitions), the people I love will leave me because I am NOT interesting enough
• I am afraid of winter sports :P
• I am afraid that my dream of becoming an entrepreneur will never happen. I have hopes and dreams of switching to the fashion/beauty industry and add a healing component to this... But who would buy THAT anyway? How can one take something traditionally superficial into something deeper?
• I am very fearful of getting wrongly accused for something
• I am afraid of dying - because it would weigh heavily upon me to know that the people that love me will be heartbroken and mourning

I fear:

Being ordinary.

Never being able to express myself creatively ever again.

Thinking my craft/garden/project ideas are boring and redundant.

Offending people.  (That's the three Libra planets and Libra DSC)

Not being liked for who I am.

Having to be "knocked out" for surgery or oral surgery.  Fortunately, I'm very healthy and never had to go through this, but I hate not being in control, and this is as out of control as it gets.  (Weak Neptune, lots of Cardinal, lots of Virgo--yes, I'm a control freak--not with others but definitely with myself)

I am sag sun/moon/merc/mars/neptune/mc in the 9th and am terrified to drive.  I got my license at 25 but haven't used it in 4 years.  I am scared of killing someone and just being to stupid to know how to avoid it. 

Other than that I'm pretty much scared of everything.   Saturn squares most of that stellium.

Reading the posts in this thread made me realize how many fears I've let go of -- because most of the stuff I feared has happened and I'm still here.  I feared getting divorced, having my business fail, filing for bankruptcy, and moving back with my parents -- did all of that, and I'm okay.  Now I just fear never getting laid again and never having a partner.