In reading through the blog post I simply cant figure out what I am missing in my EX'S chart that he wont let me be. Elsa suggested that I post here for more input. If you wouldn't mind taking a shot at this chart I'd love to hear your thoughts. I keep thinking if I could figure out what natally inspires this I might be able to get away from it. Tired of the stockerish, manipulative exploits.

not an astrologer

natal pluto trine mercury....obsessive thinking?

transiting pluto conjunct venus....relationship problems, manipulation

bottom line, he is choosing to express the energy in this way

@learningtoground- That Cap Sun and Scorpio Moon make it HARD to let go...

My mom is a Cap Sun/Scorp Moon and she still clings to the memories of my dad. They divorced in 1977! And he killed himself in 1999!

She has been remarried for 25 years now. She STILL hangs onto her anger and animosity for my dad. The poor bastard has been dead for twelve years and out of her life for 34 years... She cannot/will not let go...

I don't know what the answer is for your ex, but I do know what I've witnessed from my mom, my entire life... The clinging to an idea or memory and how it consumes one's life. Not healthy...

*run away!*

Can't seem to. We have kids together and everytime I think he's letting up i find something new. Like discovering how he's been tracking somethings for 3 years now. I tried to change my email password and found out he had it linked. So when I changed things the changes went to his mothers email addy. I have spent the whole damn day changing every electronic password and account I own... at least all the ones I can think of.

The only upside is now I know. There where times I thought I might be going crazy they way he knew things made me paranoid. Now I know my gut was right and I am taking action! No legal action to take though cuz I can't prove things. No direct link to him. It would only implicate his mother. So insted I'll make my changes and maybe someone will see a way out in his chart for me.

That's not normal... He needs to let go of you... I can see how disturbing that scenario would be...

Well. I see moon conjunct neptune in scorpio squared by mars, which is a shitty aspect and one I own myself. My mars is in Leo though, so this is more of a "getting zapped by my own hubris" kind of aspect in the tenth than what this looks like, with mars in pisces, which is an extremely *diffuse* aggressive nature -- in other words he really does not know how to and would not anyway outwardly speak his displeasure.

Neptune conjunct the moon is also Piscean, but the whole problem there is the native has no idea what is really bothering him or why. All aggression is kind of flowing under the surface of the subconscious and it has to be actively managed -- or I should say, anyone with this aspect who does not want to be stung to death by his own craziness has to work at *integrating* the rage and aggression of the mars/pluto contact through the water signs. So it seems to me that a person with a Scorpio moon, vengeful, sneaky, and subversive, along with Neptune which clouds the nature and makes it very hard to pin down, square mars in Pisces which gives this *double dose* of diffuse aggression -- makes his behavior kind of predictable.

Not to mention the Leo rising which would probably make it hard to believe that any woman could possibly break up with him.

What he's doing is getting control of you, this person who harmed him. He's finding out everything he can about you so he can assimilate it and then feel you've been conquered. I sincerely doubt he'd ever do anything or act on his aggressive feelings -- this *is* the aggression.

I think you should just call him up and tell him to stop it. Scorpio moon is shocked when it gets caught. Shocked. It's like that obsessive behavior is harmless and not even attached to the individual if nobody sees it. But once it's out in the sunshine...the power of it is gone.

his moon is at 6 degrees sagittarius

Lona, Yup Sagittarius.

His mars is conjunct my sun by less than a degree.

His Nept conjunct my moon by less than a degree

his moon conj my neptune by less than a degree

His Chiron conjunct my merc by less than a degree

Sun/Venus and a Leo Asc - self-love? I agree he can't accept rejection. I also agree he is trying to control the situation by 'owning' knowledge of you (being Cap myself, I recognise that mechanism and it's something I have to control in myself).

Sag Moon - some aggression in his feelings? Impulsiveness and temper.

Libra Uranus opposes his Cap Sun/Venus: unwillingness to accept change in relationships perhaps? - that's just a guess. And Saturn square Mercury - problems in communication?

I also feel Saturn / Jupiter on the MC / IC line is probably a player, but you would need to google for what that might mean.

you both have Neptune to Moon conjunctions - I'd hazard a guess and say that neither of you see the other persons needs.  It's all fogged up and full of illusion.  Both of you.

He has a lot of Capricorn plus his Chiron at 2d is probably going to get whacked by the Cardinal grand cross that has been active for while now.  It seems to be early days for Pluto on his Venus but shortly that is going to happen. 

He has a t-square with Merc in Capricorn at the apex and at an anaretic degree.  That is a tough position to have.  There is a real hesitation for people with anaretic degree planets - a real love of the familiar and a fear of the unknown.  A Merc In Cap person is also going to crave structure and order, they hate change. 

The trick to any t-square is the position, exactly opposite it or 29d Cancer.  Do you have any planets near to that? 

Probably easier to just post mine so theres no guessing

you both have Neptune to Moon conjunctions - I'd hazard a guess and say that neither of you see the other persons needs.  It's all fogged up and full of illusion.  Both of you.

Im staying rather quiet on it because I don't want to guide the discussion because I really want a view from the outside.

I will say that there was a pour basis in the begining of our relationship. I had and sometimes still do though I battle for balance with it.. a tendancy to be drawn in by the underdog hurting individual senario. Once there were kids involved something snapped and I just couldn't handle the hurting refussing to grow past the past mentality anymore. And yes I totally quit caring about his needs beyond the basics that kept him nice to us.

You are guys are really opening somethings for me. I look forward to reading more.

If you need anymore info please let me know. Otherwise I will wait a bit more to put more details/history out there. 

Mahchi, Would my 3 Leo south node be close enough to the 29 cancer degree? and his lilith at 2 Leo?

learning, if he is a prominent Capricorn, then you have to give it time. For how long has this been going on? You both have Mars with Pisces flavor (you have taurus Mars in 12th, he has a Pisces Mars) so I imagine you are not good at directing your anger in a clear and safe manner. If he is upset he should tell you in the face, if you are upset and mad you should tell him in the face. But he is beating around the bushes and maybe you are too.

Are you saying he knew the passwords to your accounts from when you were married or you made those accounts when you no longer were with him and he found out the passwords?

@elisei, I changed my email password when we were going through divorce 3 years ago but I didn't know he had added a thing to it so that any changes to the account including passwords would go to him. That gave him full access to all my accounts because all account password retrieval for credit cards boards etc go to that email

I'm a communicator. Let's talk this through let's go to counseling. Let's get a therapist, so u can deal with your addictions?I don't seem qualified to help? Let's get u someone who can. Finally i gave up it was to tiring and i didn't care anymore. Focased on kids then pluto hit cap. And I said I was done