Hi,

this is my first message and I was wondering who is more powerful?

Me - sun virgo, moon can, rising pluto conj asc, mars in leo

arch enemy- sun leo, moon cap, mars scorpio

 By powerful , I mean in terms of vibes, will and tenacity?

Zara 

You will become more powerful than you are today as soon as you stop thinking of people as your arch enemies!

Seriously, I'm being totally serious. Having "enemies" takes work. Having "enemies" drains us emotionally and that saps us of our personal power.

Having "enemies" means missing out on opportunities and positive experiences and everything else that comes with an open mind and accepting heart.

Why do you even give a shit about this? 

I'm not saying I have never felt jealous that a woman might be flirting with my man, angry that someone would try to undermine me etc. One could perceive such a person as an "enemy," sure.

But I do know that when I find a way to remove said person from my life (stop hanging out with them), patch the situation (boyfriend is flirting? dump him) or move past the feelings that block me and get that person on my team (she's not so bad, maybe it's ME!)... ahhhh! What a relief. No more worrying. No more being on the defensive. Who wants to spend their life that way? Fah! Misery.

I dont hang out with her and have just met her once, would you believe that?

I met her 5 yrs ago and shes family now. she was an absolute bitch the first time we met and since then has been making a mess of things for me. she hangs out with bad company and no one knows about it. she presents herself as completely innocent. on the other hand, tries to tell everyone that im not right for the family. this is underhanded and manipulative. I just dont know how to deal with it and have been ignoring it until now.

anyway, your absolutely right but i just cant turn the other cheek

hahahahahaha, I've got lots of scorpio and I totally understand the fun of having an "arch enemy" and btw it is wrong, but oh so fun.

um, to answer your question... when you get a mix of leo and cap you a Mao Zedong type, so....... I would just back down and let her be foiled by her own campaigns.

Hmm, your arch enemy would probably intimidate me. It's the Leo sun that pushes it over the edge for me. The Leo sun in that combination.

You with virgo sun and moon in cancer and pluto rising? I feel that you feel powerful but part of your power is your sensitivity.

Btw, I HATE having enemies and I have at least one now, maybe two. For different reasons though.

welcome, zara.

as far as your enemy, well, hell. if she's met you once and then badmouths you to the rest of the fam, that says a lot about her. if the family is listening to it, it says a lot about them that has nothing to do with either one of you.

if i heard someone parroting some of that crap, i'd look at them like they were an idiot and say something like, "Whhhhaaaa? We've met exactly ONCE 5 years ago. I have no idea what you're talking about and don't want to." 

All I can add to this is that I am Pluto rising and my sister has Mars in Scorpio in the 1 house....I have been told I am too confrontational....I like direct communication and like to get to the bottom of problems fast and efficiently.  She is very secretive and likes to go behind the scenes to make attacks and this is aggravating to me.  I know I aggravate her too, so to each his own.  I really detest underhanded plays, but I also don't have a poker face....what I feel is written all over my face....whereas she does have a poker face and I have wished I had more of that at times.

Hm well, for one don't question your power cuz just in doing that you are already eroding it. In fact, with that scorpio mars, she might already be counting on your virgoan self-doubt keeping you unsure and silent.

Has she somehow been married in to the family? I'm not sure on the details here, but if this is Your family and she is an outsider you already have one advantage being that your family knows you. So bring the problem into light. While being your usual, familial self bring up the issue of this outside woman badmouthing you. Combat her underhandedness with being completely open, honest, and human. You've got that on your side. Perhaps your family will back you up on this one and tell her to shut up. If she has no one to manipulate with her gossip then her game is already shot down!

You could even call her and take her behavior into question while with a family member so that you have someone witnessing you as a rational peacemaker. If she ends up continuing the sneaky antics, it will make her look very bad. If you've already tried this, well... The fact that you know personal info about her is ammo. Why let them view her as an angel while she slanders your reputation? However... if you're unsure about yourself, tread lightly.

goddess, thats exactly what iv been doin so far but it doesnt freakin stop. and the worst part is she goes behind my back. the only way i get to know that shes been at work is when others' reactions to me change. 

Alpha, iv married into her family.  she's my sister in law, lol.   this is where the prob lies. im the outsider so she has a huge advantage over me. i havent reacted to her at all but believe me, every inch of me wants to let her have it. and by that i mean serious stuff. the three of us (my husband and i and his sister) live in the same city. she lives with a friend. 

my husband has been bright enuf to see this behavior and avoids  her too. we have lent her money, helped her alot. she turns around and says to their family that her brother avoids her and is rude to her since he married me. the truth is her brother avoids her coz she has been nothing but rude to him and only calls when she needs something. but mainly coz shes hanging out with people who she thinks can propel her towards a better standard of living. they are rich, spoilt and the guys are notorious for their attitudes towards women. what brother wouldlike that?

we have still kept our mouths shut coz we feel it would be bad karma to go behind a persons back. bitches no exception. but maannnnnn.

denamaria, u described it perfectly. especially about mars in sco having a poker face whereas we are so transparent. honestly, i dont know y i asked the question that i did. im taking her comments and attitude very personally and i wanted to stop feeling powerless. the other day i dreamt that i had four teeth missing, i looked it up and found powerlessness manifests itself as missing teeth 

notatirem, how did u know that her plans get foiled?  coz that does happen to her often. 

well you cannot control her. you cannot control how other people respond to her. so what's left is living in a way you feel good.

i had an arch enemy once myself. and i obsessed over what they were saying and weren't, to whom and who believed what; her actions did, indeed, impact my life significantly. i lost a LOT over this. the kind of stuff that can never be recovered. i absolutely wanted to kill her and felt violent in a way that i had never even considered myself capable of before that. so i ain't gonna spurt sunshine and rainbow flowers at ya about why it's bad to feel that way.i know i have the capacity in me.

eventually, the anger burning every day was eating me up inside. i was having a recurring dream whee she was moving in with us and there was nothing i could do. i realized that she was already living with me in my head and i wanted her out. so i decided to evict her.

some families get off on the drama one of these folks provides; they are also sometimes relieved that it's you and/or your hubby on the radar, because it keeps them from being the focus of the attacks themselves. but you know, you can opt out of the drama by refusing to participate. people that put out that kind of crap do often foil themselves with it. you just have to be standing far enough away you don't get any of the backblast on ya...

good luck!

thnx goddess. people participating in this to keep themselves free of scrutiny makes alot of sense. im definitely gonna start freezing her out. why didnt i think like this before. lol

good luck zara!

hey people, i need some counseling here.. again.

guess whos getting a car FOR FREE. yep, my husbands sister. and guess what, her parents r looking the other way, lolol. can u fucking believe that. okay, i dont know how to deal with this anymore. this freezing out thing isnt working. the designer sun glasses and bags, parlors, and eating at the most expensive restaurants was bad enough. but a whole fucking car??

i had a huge fight with my husband coz he isnt saying or doing anything. he told their dad about it a few weeks ago and he put it in the nicest way. like "oh btw,  i think shes doing something bad but i could be wrong. i could totally be wrong". my husband is a taurus and his mars and mercury is in taurus too.  his moon is in gemini. it took me forever to get him to tell their dad and he has to put it in the most negligible way. how could he be so impervious to this? am i the only one who wants to bash her face in when she suggests we should try so and so restaurant coz they have the best steak or whatever. places she knows are very high end, shes doing this all the time! im really mad at my husband rite about now. i think he's scared of her or something, i dont know. 

y the hell does she keep calling when my husband hardly ever calls her?

i think the only therapy for me is to punch her lights out personally. theres no other way. 

 someone help..