In my experience, mom is rarely wrong. So what's you mom like? How did this impact you? Are we destined to become our mothers (or end up marrying them, psychologically or literally speaking)? What's your moon/fourth house influence? Better yet, do you know her chart in aspect to your own?

My mother's retrograde jupiter sits on my IC. This is the first time I noticed that, so I'm not sure at first what to make of it.

Her chiron is conjunct my moon in Aquarius (6th), and I have spent my entire life feeling as if I'm the only person in the world who understands her or has any sympathy for her whatsoever. I spent my youth until adulthood "serving" as her confidante and comforter. Talk about 6th house, Moon, and wounded healer right there. This dynamic is played out on my DC, and across the axis her Venus/Vesta/Pluto sit precisely on my Ascendant.

Her retrograde saturn is precise conjunct with my jupiter in Capricorn in the 5th. Something tells me that if/when I have children, we'll probably have tensions about it. She has never acknowledged my talents. When I was young, instead of praise, I heard things like "You work really hard at playing the piano, but your brother is naturally talented at it." Which, seriously pushed my buttons.

My mom can be a tyrant. I am the only one in the family that can talk to her and tell her how to take care of herself. Our roles are usually switched when we're together, I am the mother and she is the one seeking my advice. Though, she does attempt to stir the pot and share things with others that are meant to stay between us.

I'm not sure of the synastry exactly since she was adopted and has no known birth time, however I do have a Moon/Pluto conjunction that I chaulk up to our power struggles.

My mom doesn't fit with my fourth house at all, really. We're both Tauruses (2nd and 3rd generation!), but our moons are drastically different and we don't get along on an emotional level at all. If we stick to shopping and going to the theater, we get along fine, but talking about our feelings, well...that's why we're in group therapy, to reiterate that no, I don't feel the way that she does.

She's very clingy (Pisces Moon), desperately lonely (Pisces Moon on descendant), kind of a martyr who's constantly serving others (Virgo rising) and I'm an only child. Most of the time I am the person she deems responsible for fulfilling her emotional needs and it drives me nuts. She expects me to cling and self-sacrifice the way that she does and I don't want to (I have no Pisces or Virgo). I wish she'd find a new boyfriend/parasite to leech off of, but she refuses and says she's "not ready." I don't care how "not ready" she is. I find it hard to imagine that a Moon/Descendant person isn't immediately jumping into finding a new man, except for the part where she has a crush on a married friend of hers. Sigh. 

Where we're kind of infamously BOUND together is that our nodes are opposite each other and her Venus on her NN is conjunct my south. I feel like I cannot get away from her, period. I suspect we were married in a past life, I was the guy and treated her like crap, and in this life I'm not allowed to get a divorce. I think we're still married and I'm still her husband.

My mum and I have our North Nodes at the exact same degree in Libra. There are a lot of things about her that I admire deeply but she spent *years* bat shit crazy making our family life unbearable. We basically had a war going on from the time I left home at 16 until I was in my mid-twenties. I think part of it was she has had zero relationship with her family since she was shipped off to bible college when she was 16. She tried to control/live through her children. I strongly suspect my 4th House South Node is conjunct her Sun. Her Aquarius Moon opposes my 8th House Saturn.

First of all, Im a Sagittarius sun, Aquarius moon. My mother is a Virgo sun with a Leo moon and thats just the beginning of the disaster. Her Sun conjunction in Virgo is square my Saturn in Sagittarius. This is very difficult aspects in synastry. Its a fight to the finish. I also have pluto Virgo in the fourth house.

 As for our relationship....I ask God all the time...WHY?!!! 

Cosmic, oof, I feel you on the Pluto/Sun exchange.

Overall good because my mom's a Leo and I'm a Sagittarius. Very good combination!

But whenever my grades go down for a semester, those Leo claws come out! XOXO.

My mom is the matriarch and the tenth house parent for me.  Shes a Gemini Sun/Cap moon.  Ive got fourth house Uranus and Neptune and that's my Dad all the way, the Aquarian sailor with Cancer moon.

My scorp moon is in the third and I get along swimmingly with my mom, we talk on the phone alot.

My Libra moon is conjunct Pluto in the 4th house. I don't see all the negative stuff about that aspect regarding my mother. We get along well and watch each others backs. Her NN in Sag is conjunct my Sun and my Cancer NN is on her ascendant. 

My mom was a Gemini.

I personally believe she was undiagnosed with something (bi-polar, or similar), because she was usually moody and when she was moody - watch out. We fought like cats and dogs when I was growing up, until I moved out and started to grow up.

I was very Pisces and she was very Gemini and it's hard to nurture a Pisces when you're not very loving-emotional yourself. No hard feelings, I'm old enough now to let go of what I wasn't given and embrace what she did give:

She had an awesome sense of humor. Her entire body shook when she laughed and when things were light-hearted, that was all we ever did was laugh.

She was a tough, strong individual. Very intelligent, all about seeking knowledge and information. She got her black belt in Kenpo Karate when she as going through chemotheraphy from lung cancer at 43,  and wouldn't let them go easy on he because of her illness. That alone got me through fires school - if she could do THAT with lung cancer, I could do fire school perfectly healthy; no excuses!

It also sticks out for me that she was very pro-sexuality. Very "sex is natural and nothing to be ashamed of, just be careful and make sure you respect yourself and your partner". I think it's why I was a virgin until I was 19 and why I have virtually no sexual hang ups now, and I thank her SO much for that. (My black moon is in Scorpio, so I extra apprciate it). For some reason this has been a big positive influence in my lief.

She taught me how to be self-sufficient, how to roll up my sleeves and do whatever needs to be done.  How to be mature and responsible, and yet silly and immature at the same time. Taught me that it's okay to be who I am, and to try not to give in to the bad habits and laziness that still to this day get in my way (we're all a work in progress, right?)

Her best words to me ever were when I was having a real though time, struggling through puberty, my past (my dad kidnapped me when I was a year old,  and I didn't see my mom again until I was 8) and high school all at once,  and just having a SHITTY time with LIFE:

"I know that when you figure out who you are, you'll know what to do with it."

She was....inspirational. She wasn't perfect, but man...I hope I get to be HALF the woman she was when I reach my prime.

She was pretty kick-ass.

My mum was amazing.. A lovely earthy Taurus with a huge need for her own space..her  Aquarian Jupiter was on my Ascendant, her Gemini Moon on my IC in 4th house.. a zillion things I could say some rosy some tricky, but now she's gone, all that's there is missing her, so much, 23 years later, still.

Guys. I think it's also good to check your chart placings, seeing them as transits to your Mum's chart.. for example..Cosmickisses: Your Saturn squares her Sun = she was having a Saturn transit when you arrived, and if Pluto is involved, well as Elsa terms it, it's the "crush".. Kash..your mum had Saturn opp her Moon..

And Notatirem ..is your Uranus Neptune near your mum's Moon? It's just interesting to see our charts not just as our own blueprints, but also as activated transits for our parents at our time of birth. Sometimes it can add another layer.

Oh and nightowl13, yes I do see clear bits of mum in myself...as do my sisters..that pleases us all somehow , plus, you're right.. I married someone with a lot of Taurus, and he has that aura, that I'm here, you're safe vibe..

Oh my daughter has a Pisces Moon exactly conjunct my Mercury, and she has a daughter whose Uranus is on that Pisces Moon..why do I think I'll be sorting out some teen times there!!...and so it goes, that amazing circle of life..

thanks very much for this thought provoking post nightowl13..i just love the way these posts make me think more..My Pisces Mercury can be lazy

Luci..that's some story, you really have come through some tough times. Bet your mum would be happy to read what you just wrote.

Gemini/Pisces relating is hard to handle for me (Pisces) too. So relate to the non emotional mothering thing.. my mum's Gemini Moon..scatty, restless, no interest in keeping the home fires burning and a pot on the stove, but so YES, inspiring! Absolutely and likewise on chemo, refused to let me pamper her, except on one low day when her lashes came out and her head was too hot and then I was allowed to make myself feel better by "mothering" her as I longed to..(she enjoyed that for five minutes or so!).. but mostly she spent time raising funds to buy a laser to treat young women's cervical cancers, which was then named Iris, for her. 

Yep you had a pretty awesome mum, Luci..and she'll light up your heart forever in her own offbeat, orginal way!

I think it's quite fascinating to compare a person's chart to their mother's:

 Between us (I will list my Mom's planet first then mine) we have:

 Moon conj AC

Merc conj my Aries stellium

Although my mother's Sun is not conj my True Node orb wise it is in the sign same and can in a way give me an "example" of how to set my True Node to (in Taurus)-

 I am young and have many, many years to grow more "into" my True Node and set more down that path but I think I am headed a bit more so down that being more patient (ha, hard for an Arian to say):

 I think it's interesting how my Mother has her Moon as my AC (Virgo) and her AC as my sun (Aries).

Growing up she struggled with bipolar and at times she was often found crying in her room and sad over my father (they fought a lot, later divorced) but she was always a very strong willed woman who never backed down when she wanted something (oh the stubborn bull!)

 Her Venus about conj my Mars (As well as her Jupiter) and that can be nice in her giving me "motherly love" to get my somewhat slow and in detriment Mars to moving-

 Her Mars in Scorpio can give her a nasty temper on top of her Aries Mercury conj her own AC natally! But for now we are getting along better once again that I have mostly moved out of her place (kinda). 

My mother is a double Aquarius but her Sun and Moon are not conjunct and make her extra-credit quirky.

Her Aquarius Sun is conjunct Black Moon Lilith and opposing Pluto.

Her Aquarius Moon focal point of a T-square with Mars in Scorpio and Uranus in Taurus.

In short - LOOK OUT!

I was my mother's mother, and this was true my whole life, and it wasn't till I was an adult and learned to look at our charts that I discovered my Sun is exactly conjunct her Moon.

One more thing --  (((luci))) and (((Lindiloo)))

Aw thanks Jessica!

Elsa.. that's an amazing chart your Mum has!  Really don't have much understanding of BML.. would you mind me asking.. would that combo suggest to you, someone born at a time when the collective experience was being quite personally experienced? Hope I've made that coherent enough. I worry all the time about saying the right thing while Saturn's in Virgo!

Lindiloo - it is hard to marry the concept of a detached intellectual with the dark feminine but if you actually live with someone like this it's like every other aspect in astrology - the person lives and exudes whatever they are.  If you think of that type energy, I am sure you can imagine scenarios where the person (the woman) would have had to have this kind situation in their chart.

Specific to your question, this was an opposition to Pluto so I'd say she was detached from the collective... the shadow yet black moon lilith was conjunct her Sun. I can tell you this much: She is an inordinately cold person and I mean to the point where it's cartoonish.

She is not a mixed bag but a total aberration and remarkable to any and all who ever encountered her. 

Thanks Elsa.. this whole mother issue is fascinating, and appreciate the opportunity to chew it over a little. 

My mom is a , 6th house.  Self-sacrifice and work (to support my late grandma) were the big themes in her life.

She has 29 rising, which is right on my conjunction.  Four of my planets fall in her first house, so we have a pretty intense relationship.  She's also been a big influence on how I decided to handle relationships.

Both she and my dad have s that trine my .  Mom's is near her MC, and it falls in my 3rd house.  Communication and sharing of info was, and still is, a big thing in our family.  We always talked out our problems or issues, and no one ever went to bed angry or giving each other the silent treatment.  When I heard that other families did that, I was shocked!

My dad's chart is another story.  He and I have always been super close.  He and I have the exact same degree rising, 28 , and his is in my 7th (he's a ).

lindiloo thanks for pointing out something i never would have thought of...that this is the transit my mum was experiencing when i was born. in addition she is an aries, so i guess saturn was trine her sun when i was born. 

Kash  the transits just fascinate me because they help me to understand a little more, is all.

I grew up with the oddest of parenting. I keep trying to say stuff here and deleting it today! Me n my sisters were born in a falling apart country cottage with three rooms, two of them tacked on, a toilet with dodgy wooden walls, also tacked on..to an impoverished mum and dad who bred dogs to sell and for show, also boarded dogs for people who went holidays (in the bedroom us four girls shared..ooh, whiffy!!)..Wehad a jazz band practising on a Saturday night in the living room, too! Oh and our parents decided to learn Russian because my dad decided communism was the way forward, and became the focus of scrutiny in that tiny coal mining village where nobody stepped out of the system or did anything orginal or different.Yep, Aquarius Dad, Jupiter in Aquarius Mum!! We had a crazy childhood. All of us bullied for our accent, and for our lack or conformity as a family, no school uniforms etc.. 

My friends always really liked my mum.. people loved her and told me what a saint she was, yet she never shone that light on us girls, or so it felt until we were older, then she managed to have some individual time with each of us, and we got to know her better. I discovered after her death at age 59 from ovarian cancer, how proud she was of me, how much she'd worried, even that she'd cried for a month when I left to get married to my ex, age 16, silly me. I never, never would have guessed that. Maybe my Moon/Neptune blinded me to her? Maybe I was so busy projecting my disappointment at not having "Apple Pie Mum" ..that I wasn't appreciating Arty, Creative Mum.

The interesting thing to me, as one of the older participants here amongst such a lovely group of mixed ages and "hearing" about the experiences everyone has, is that as I got properly into astrology, my first quest was to sort out my childhood try to understand myself a bit better, parental stuff, but then when you have grown kids and they are able to show you how they experienced and are experiencing YOU, that puts another spin on things. 

My mother is a triple gemini with her moon and sun conjunct in the 12th house and Pisces on the MC... She is an enigma to say the least.

lindiloo my family is in lochgelly. maybe you can say hello to them for me:) 

another thing i realized today while thinking about this is that my mum was having her Nodal Return when I was born.

Mom is very very intuitive. I feel what she feels. We're very very close - to the point that I had to remove myself out of the country because I don't know which thoughts/feelings are hers and which ones are mine. When we lived together, we had a very strong bond yet sometimes drove each other crazy because she's uber protective and I was very independent. Moving out at 21 was the best thing I did for our relationship. We're still best friends to this day.

Moon in Cancer, 4th house. Sextiling both Saturn and Venus Trining Uranus. Squaring Pluto. 

From what I am seeing (without knowing my birth time), my Mom is a Pisces with a Moon in Taurus (that makes a lot of sense, actually)... And wow.. She has a Moon squaring Pluto as well and a moon sextiling Venus!

i mourn the fact that i'm not sure she knows how to be happy.  but i think she might be learning.

cancer 8th house stellium: jupiter mercury venus uranus all opposing mars in capricorn.

scorpio ascendent.  pluto/moon conjunction on the midheaven in leo.  sun gemini seventh.

she was the only woman in her engineering classes in grad school.  i remember playing outside her classrooms at the university.  took me forever to realize how remarkable she is.

ack!  looked at the synastry.  for the first time. her stellium sits right at the t of the t square with all the cancer i've been struggling with in the people close to me the past few years.  (it's only a t square when i meet someone with mid degree cancer.  squares my pluto opposition.)

gah!  guess i better learn this already.  it only created explosive havoc when i was younger.  and, after all, the two of us do seem to get along all right now.

 and, uhm.  both of us have our suns opposing the other's neptune.  odd.

Mom, brother & I all have Aries moons, and we all get along, understand & depend on one another. We rarely fight and when we do it's minor, rational and calm. I think mostly we enjoy each other's company & being silly with one another.Instinctively we get one another & give each other the space necessary to grow.

My father on the other hand is a Pisces moon and sometimes gets eaten alive by us. oops - I mean, we don't mean to hurt him, he's just ultra sensitive!  

My mom was very smart but she was troubled.  A cancer sun-uranus conjunction, cancer mercury, moon-mars conj in gemini and venus-pluto conj in leo.  She had mental issues (schizophrenia) and she was an alcoholic.. After having trouble finding a job, she lost it.. and also after her family abandoned her.  My dad says it disillusioned her because her family was her life.  She was a chemical engineer but had issues with one of her teachers and he "blocked" her progression into a career.

My 10th house moon-mars-venus conj is in pisces and all squared by my 6th house neptune.  I never really knew her.  I got my love of dancing and my sympathetic attitude from her but that's what I'm told.. my rising sign is cancer! Her  conjunct my ascendant and her  are in my 1st house!  My father, who I admire, is probably my 4th house influence.  He's an Aquarius (just like me!) with a virgo rising.. my 4th house is in virgo! He's also very smart and friendly but a bit too critical at times! He's a real perfectionist! 

My mother used to say that she made a baby for my father because we're so alike!  We have a lot of similarities in our natal charts.  Jupiter-uranus conj in Sag for me and the opposition jup in sag and uranus in gem for him... saturn-pluto conj in leo for him and in pluto-libra, saturn-scorpio conj for me in the 5th house! both venus in pisces.. his mars in virgo.. and so on! I have another mother.. my dad's best friend.. she didn't really raised me but I see her as my 2nd mom! She was always there and she's teaching about raising children.  She works in a daycare and is a foster mom.  She's a sag sun with saturn in cancer and jupiter in libra!! I love her.. thank God for her!

I have issues with my direction in life (my career!!!!!!!!!) and relationships.. and maybe my sexuality a bit!! I have too many illusions and expectations about the perfect guy and it's a killer!! I'm better now.. less negative and trying to be more positive and to leave the past where it is.. in the past! I'm ultra sensitive (probably my moon) but also compassionate.. I worry a lot but I just figured out that i'm tough and always hoping for better days.. probably later in life.. just like my dad!! After a hard pluto transit to my pisces planets, I'm a better.. it wasn't nice but it was needed!

This is a portrait I made of my mother.

She's a cancer with lots of leo in 12th and moon saturn in cap: in one word she is the most reliable person ever!!

tomaui....incredible artwork!!   

my mom is also very reliable (taurus sun/cap. moon) ...a couple of people once told me that should they every be stranded on a desert island with one other person...she would be the one

i feel i owe a lot to her....all the good things elsa writes about taurus and earthy signs...she embodies....and this was very grounding as i'm sun/moon pisces

 over the years (she is 84 now) there have been issues as well......i've had to work at allowing myself more internal freedoms....to not deny myself the right to things that were not hers...and to take risks according to my own hunches...

Kashmiri.. my sister lives not far from Lochgelly. Will detour next visit!

Tomaiu, ditto..fabulous portrait.. your mum sounds lovely, and her daughter has quite an awesome talent!

Lindsey.. I hear you..loud and clear re your last para.. Pisces, Pisces, sometimes it's a challenge trying to swim in two directions..when you're not even sure you can swim at all..be glad when Saturn leaves mutable Virgo!

my capricorn (with moon in Aquarius) mother was a neglected child. At least in her memories. Her father didn't care for her, he preferred his son, her brother, the virgo. My grandmother worked all the time.

ok so anyway, my relationship with this mother (scorpio venus) has been tough since i was 12. It seems to hover in and out of sheer chaos.

She was brilliant, tempermental, sexy, inflammatory. She's not so brilliant anymore, but she's still all the other stuff at the age of nearly 80

My mom is a Gemini Sun with a Capricorn Moon. I'm a Cancer Sun with an Aries Moon. I also have a Moon/Pluto/Mercury T-Square with Saturn involved.

She cared for our external needs meticulously, but absolutely could not handle emotions at all. Since I left home nearly 20 years ago, she has called me exactly once, but then complains about my infrequent calling. She has told others in my family that she is afraid of me. Understandable - Pluto/Moon is scary!

My mom is a good person, but is also the most fearful person I've ever met. I have almost no relationship with her at this point.

LOL. I just realized my mother has the moon conjunct Black Moon Lilith in Capricorn.

to Luci: 

"I was very Pisces and she was very Gemini and it's hard to nurture a Pisces when you're not very loving-emotional yourself. No hard feelings, I'm old enough now to let go of what I wasn't given and embrace what she did give:She had an awesome sense of humor. Her entire body shook when she laughed and when things were light-hearted, that was all we ever did was laugh.

She was a tough, strong individual. Very intelligent, all about seeking knowledge and information."

I never thought I'd hear anyone describe how I feel in my heart about how my mom was. I'm a pisces as well  and she was a gemini. You use the words "I'm old enough now to let go of what I wasn't given and embrace what did give". That is something that I have to come to terms with as well. I think you can only understand how hard it is to come to terms with this if you've had a Gemini mom like mine.  

Fiercly independent, infectiously humorous and delightful to be around. She was in no way an emotional or empathic person and didn't nurture her children her home or her marriage  in a traditional way. Not out of selfishness by any means. I don't know what our relationship would be like today since I lost my mom at 24. To say that I miss her would be incorrect, in truth I've missed her all my live.

My mom will be 87 in a few weeks.  A Libra that taught me to consider the other person in all that I do.  She's been a widow for 25 years.  Dad was an Aquarius.

We get along very well.  Or, she's too polite to say much.  

Her sun sits in my 7th house.  My sun sits in her 6th, near the DC.  Our family seems dominated by Cancer moons.  Mom has Cancer rising, with a moon in Gemini.